Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Hot dog storm, utensil magazine

On the weekend Serge mentioned that he hadn't had Ruffles chips with onion and sour cream dip in a long time and how he missed it. Well I missed it too so when I went to the market I picked up this bag of chips (I don't like Ruffles - too salty) because I thought it was like Ruffles. When we were eating them with the sour cream and onion dip Serge asked why I had bought flavored chips. I said that they were not flavored he was imagining things. Then he went and got the bag. Flavored with a hot dog, mustard and relish. Have you ever seen anything so retarded? They're not so bad, just kind of weird. Hot dog flavored potato chips.

Oh my but did we have a big storm blow through on Monday afternoon. Here is what the sky looked like before all hell broke loose. The sun would have been right there but it was so eerie and the sky was roiling. The rain and hail and wind spooked us so much that we retreated to the interior closet. Yesterday when I walked the dog there were tree limbs down all over the place. It wasn't a tornado but boy did the winds blow. The rain gauge measured 1.12 inches in 23 minutes. That's some storm right there!

Hey I've got another disagreement to bounce off of you. You know how the division of labor in our household works so well to avoid marital discord. Well I had a minor complaint this week and it's about the dishwasher. Remember he loads it up and I empty it out. Well when he loads the utensils he puts them in the little basket with the sharp edges and fork tines sticking up. I don't like this because I've stabbed myself inadvertently more than once so I asked him to put the sharp edges pointing down. He says they get cleaner sticking up. But the basket has holes all through it, surely they get clean pointing down I protest.  Moreover, I have to touch every part that will touch our mouths when I unload the utensils. So that's not very "clean" now is it? He said I just have to make sure I wash my hands before I unload. Comments please. How is it in your house?

Look, we got published! Thanks to Father Tony, we got to see this result of the photo shoot we did in New York back in May. It is for Pride magazine which is distributed for the gay pride week festivities. They feature several couples with a quote and this one was ours. We had a wicked hangover that morning but you'd never know it eh? Also I made a mistake on the quote. It should have said when you're married instead of when you marry. Oh well, the sentiment is the same. Happy hump day peeps! (I say that in solidarity for the employed readers. It's just another day to loaf around for me.)

Monday, June 28, 2010

Weekend update

Weekends are supposed to be fun but this one saw us cleaning up the upstairs apartment getting it ready for the new tenant who moved in yesterday. We both hate cleaning up someone else's funk and I really don't see how someone can come to our door and claim, "I'm all done cleaning up," when that didn't even entail using a broom. It was gross and the things he didn't want he just left. That's okay, we'll be happy to take that out to the curb for you. And here is when I start sounding like an old man but what is wrong with people these days?

My recompense? Mexican food! Well, sort of. It does look like Mexican food doesn't it? This is that place that opened up on the plateau called Koka Loka which is decorated in that gaudy pinata way with bright colors, oddly matched, thrown up onto all the walls. Purple and Red and Yellow and Green and bright as can be. Okay they got the cheesy decor down. This is the place that at Yelp, the lone reviewer claimed, "It was like the chefs looked at a picture of Mexican food and imagined what went in it to make it look that way." Well I wouldn't go that far, but the salsa served with the chips looked and tasted like they used spaghetti sauce as a base. So. I had a vegetarian tostada which was okay. I'm looking forward to getting the real thing when I get back to California.

So the new tenant arrived with a moving truck yesterday just as we finished watersealing her balcony. When we asked for the balance of the rent (Serge let her sign the lease with a mere $100 deposit) she whined and offered a post dated check for the first of the month. So not only did she get 4 free days but she took possession with a hundred bucks and a promise. It remains to be seen whether or not we're idiots. Okay back to the big walk yesterday. When the movers arrived, we took off, had Mexican food and then walked around town. It was a beautiful day.  The jazz festival was in full swing (get it?) and we listened to some big band for a while and had a drink.

Since it was a Sunday, Tam Tam was happening so we went over and listened to the hypnotic beating at the drum circle where people joined and left the group as the beat morphed according to I'm not sure what. Very organic is the best way I can put it. I've never seen so many people openly smoking pot since I was in Amsterdam either.

Then we happened upon a festival (you can't throw a stick without hitting a festival in Montreal in the summer) that I think was a steel drum band competition. Or a caribbean festival, not sure. But we were totally mesmerized by these kids playing the steel drums. Normally I don't like this sound, but they were good. Here listen:

Then we came home and Georgie was a good boy waiting for us. He didn't chew anything. I think he's finally starting to lose his severe separation anxiety. He still sticks to me like glue but he doesn't cry so much now when one of us leaves. Who's a good boy?

Five o'clock already? Serge garnished our drinks with, wait what's this flower? He can't remember either, he just knows it's edible. Anyway it was a nice end to a great walk and a work filled weekend. Now it's Monday but it's all the same to me cuz I is on vacation. (Don't hate.)

Friday, June 25, 2010


* It's been a while since I've done a snippety post. There's lots of little things to mention, but nothing earthshattering. Being on vacation, I've been walking around town a lot and have been pleased to notice more and more of the trash cans like the one above. On the other side is a slot for trash and on this side there's a slot for anything recyclable. I was pretty shocked that we couldn't find ANY recycle receptacles in New York City.

* I was also shocked on our last flight on US Airways. When we held our cans until they came by for recycling, we were told with that "how could you be so stupid" way that "We don't recycle, it would just be impossible to implement." Really? You're collecting the trash anyway, why can't you collect it in a more intelligent way? I know I've got at least one flight attendant reader - why don't airlines recycle?

* We have Fridge again! We lived for a week out of an ice chest and then the guy came and fixed our appliance and it is so nice to have it back. It was cute at first with the ice chest, but the novelty wore off quickly. (And they don't really keep things that cold either.)

* On the walk to the doggie park, I pass by this new condo development where all the units have fake balconies. I don't get it, why didn't they just make a real balcony? Or just leave it off altogether.

* Serge chickened out the other day and didn't get his teeth pulled. They don't hurt so I keep saying to keep them until there's pain or they fall out. The dentist seemed to think they needed to be out. As far as I know he hasn't rescheduled.

* It was the Quebec holiday celebrating all things Quebec yesterday. The parade went in front of our place. We hung out around the house and did little. The pictures came out crappy.

* Here's something I picked up for mommy. A couple bags of rice. Ever since I've been back from Spain, I've been eating olives and Serrano ham pretty much every day. Not a lot mind you, just a couple nibblets at cocktail hour.

* Wow, this is really boring isn't it? Hang in there, you're almost through.

* We watched Ché this week. I enjoyed it, but it's always hard to "watch" when you're stuck reading the subtitles the whole time. Oh and the last season of Nip Tuck is available across the street. Usually I wait until the DVDs are not at the "premiere" price but I crumbled and got the first disc. Now if we can just hold off on the other 5 discs. At $5.75 apiece, it makes for pricey TV.

* The village is looking festive this year. This part of Ste Catherine street is closed for the summer again and I rather like how they've decorated it. It'll be closed and for pedestrians only until September.

* Have I mentioned how much I love being on vacation? Totally undercapitalized but walks are free. Every day I wake up and do that quick run down in my head, what day is it, where do I have to go, what do I have to do, and then I realize the answer to that is, it doesn't matter, nowhere, nothing. Bliss.

* I've been spending a lot of time here playing Pai Gow and Caribbean Stud. Not for money of course, but the practice mode is free. My luck is up and down so it doesn't make me want to open an account. Great time waster though.

* Another stick he brought home from one of our walks. He is so cute strutting down the street with his treasures found in the park. It's kind of a pain when he shreds the stick up all over the floor, but it's all part of having a dog.

* Oh and he did not do anything out of the ordinary before the earthquake. You heard about that didn't you? I was sitting at the puter and my chair started rocking and I shouted "Earthquake" over and over. Serge was pacing on the phone in the other room and didn't notice it until it was over and he saw the lamp swinging. I thought I had left those behind in California. It was only a five and fives are just a fun ride. It's the 7 and over that I never want to see again. There was a funny bit on the CBC website. Someone commented that there was a tsunami alert on the fake lake in Toronto. That's way over the heads of my American friends, but all the Canerdians will get it.

* Sorry about the length and uninterestingness of it all. Hope you have a lovely Friday. I'm off to walk the dog and putter about. Oh and the jazz festival starts today, so maybe I'll take in some free concert action. Ciao!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010


You know I consider myself a fairly bright person. When something happens condtradicting this belief, it is hard for me to accept. And yesterday, I did something so dumb I've been filled with hatred for myself ever since. Here's how it went down.
I got up sleepy eyed and set the coffee to brewing while I came to my computer. There was a window open that was a kind of news website with the lead article from one of their bloggers announcing some amazing new diet breakthrough. The blogger was from Montreal which intrigued me so I started reading the woman's amazing experience with this, and this is where my stupidity really shines, new pill combo that you take and the pounds just melt off. (I know! I'm cringing as I type!) You might be aware that I'd like to drop about 10 pounds because I've gained 20 since I quit smoking. Anyway, at the end of the article were two coupons for "risk free" trials of the pills. The coupons let you get the shipping for half price, so you could try the stuff for a month for under 10 bucks. Coupons are another weakness of mine and of course they expired the same day. So I went and signed up for the "free" bottles which were from two different companies. The second company I noticed that you were signing up for a subscription and that you would have to cancel before two weeks was up in order not to be charged for subsequent bottles.

Okay, I thought, I remember the music subscriptions where you got free discs and then a new one came to your door each month. Fine, I'll check it out and then cancel before the time limit. I pushed buy and then went to get my coffee. Why oh why oh why. When I noticed that the second bottle had the subscription requirement I went back to the first bottle and looked at the fine print to realize that it was the same thing there only you had to send back the empty bottle (to England) in order for the cancellation to be valid. Ru-roh. Oh and you had to cancel by phone or email and then they had to receive the bottle within four days for it to be valid. Double ru-roh. This all seemed fishy now especially with the coffee now coursing my body waking me up. I wrote down all the things I must do and the dates and then went back to the original site where that article was.

That's when I realized I had been scammed. The "news" site had all the usual tabs, world, local, business, weather etc but when you clicked on any of them, a pop up window appeared with the exact same page. It was a fake page with a fake article about a fake weight loss scheme! Do you know how yucky if feels to realize the depth of your dupage? Well if there's any silver lining, at least you know you're alive with those wildly negative emotions flying around. Then you start typing "acai berry" into google and you get "acai berry scam" as a suggestion and there you see all your worst fears confirmed. See, the problem is, it's impossible to cancel and most folks end up having to cancel their credit card accounts. Fun! Of course I tried to cancel immediately before I even get the trial bottle. I haven't had much luck of course. My "help ticket" while "very important" to them goes unanswered and when I finally got a human at the other place, I wasn't in the system yet and I should try again today. Sigh.

I checked with my card company and there were only the little charges for shipping on there so that's good. Also, it just so happens I'm changing that account to a different type of card which will have a different account number and everything but the bank couldn't say for certain if this would protect me from future charges. I sure hope it does. If it doesn't, my stupidity will cost a couple hundred bucks and I'll cease being a customer of that bank. Now, aren't you glad you're not me? I think this calls for a Georgie pic.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Odds and ends

What're you doing down there? He really doesn't mind us messing around with his feet unless the clippers are near. Then it's whine city. I had his nails cut again with the free service across the street and he whimpered (loudly) all along. He must have been traumatized sometime before we got him because he's really a big baby about it.
My hillbilly husband is having two teeth removed today. Cue the sad trombone. This is what happens when you shun dentist visits for too many years. He had one removed many years ago, I'd say about 15, but you'd never know it since it doesn't show. These aren't really going to show either since they are in the back. Now he has to decide between the cheaper partial denture or the automobile priced implants. I feel bad for him so I'll be extra nice today when he comes back. Would you like a smoothie honey?
It's just lovely this getting old bit. We were at a little birthday barbeque on Saturday and the gang was primarily around 30 years old. They were actually talking about how they didn't feel quite as spry as in their twenties and how little pains were cropping up where there had been none before. Ha! We had to inform them that they better get used to it since it's all downhill from there. Honestly though, I didn't think those things at 30. 40 yes, but not 30. My latest ailment is arthritis which it looks as though I've inherited from my mother. It's just eating away at my right pinkie finger these days. I don't notice it much unless I shake someone's hand and then, ouch! As I understand it, it's only going to get worse over the years. Fun!
We have so many dang flies in the house. I don't mind it so much unless I go outside and see them crammed onto a Georgie turd as though it were a small beach on a sunny day. Then I remember how dirty the creatures are. The reason there are so many is that we leave the back door open so Georgie is free to go in and out to do his business. (Poor little guy didn't see the screen door and ran smack into it the first time. Now the screen is open too.) So Serge opened one of the front windows and took the screen off. I asked him about it since the way I see it, there are now two entryways for flies. He said, "I took it off to get rid of the flies." I pressed for an explanation of his logic. "They have no way to get out, so now when they come in they can just fly out the other side." As you can imagine, there are still flies in our house. What we need is a screen door/doggy door. I wonder if that exists.
Today is Monday, the first day of summer and I do not have to work. Yippee dee dee!

Friday, June 18, 2010


This was a hard shot to get. There's always that beat between pushing the "take the picture" button and the camera actually taking the shot. I have tons of pictures of the moment right after what I wanted to take. This time I got it though. Looking at it now it sure seems like Georgie's got a big one for his body size, doesn't it? That's one hung dog right there. Nutless sure, but hung nonetheless.

I'm so proud of Serge. He had a repairman come out for the refrigerator and was told it'd be $375 to repair (all the gas leaked out and it needs a new evaporator) and though he really, really wanted a new one, he okayed the repair. We have to wait until the beginning of next week though.

For now, we are living out of an ice chest. Each day we "make" a block of ice in the freezer and then put it in the camping cooler. Thrifty as I am, I suggested we just forego a fridge and make ice for the coolers for our milk and whatnot. Isn't that what they did a long time ago? Isn't that why we sometimes call it an icebox? Works just fine. Serge mocked me derisively when I suggested that.

Today is my last day of work for the summer! And it's a cake day too, we are just going out to lunch for the last class. Dim sum too! Then a little paperwork and I'm free free free! I have submitted an application for unemployment though I don't know if I'll be approved. I'm on the fence about it. If I do get it, I'll have to prove that I'm looking for work, but really I just want to take the two and a half months off and enjoy it. We'll see what happens. No fabulous cruises or jaunts to Europe this summer, but I do have a couple things planned. My annual summer visit to California is on, with side trips to San Fran (to see baby brother) and Las Vegas for a couple days. I was sent an invite from the Venetian to stay free in a suite plus $75 in free slot play. They are gonna lose money on me, but they don't know that yet. Then when I get back from there, Serge and I are gonna take a road trip for a few days up to Lac Saint Jean, Charlevoix and Quebec City. Then in August we're going to meet friends for a weekend in Ogunquit Maine, a state I've never visited. So lot's of things going on, I don't see how I can look for a job too : )

Let the summer vacation begin!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Blahdy blahdy blah

I found out yesterday that I'm eligible for unemployment benefits since I've worked enough insurable hours to qualify in the past 12 months. Of course they make it quite complicated for you to collect. In my case, I've got three employers I've got to get paperwork from and I've got to review every week in the past 52 and detail how much I made and if I didn't make anything, why not. I don't even remember what I did last week, let alone 25 weeks ago. I went in and asked, "Can't I just bring in all the pay stubs? Of course I can't, that would be too simple (and forgeable I suppose.) Anyway, my philosophy is if there's money on the ground you bend over and pick it up, so I'll spend tomorrow trying to get that application done.

Today I've got my second to last gig (Friday's the last but it's a class+lunch at a restaurant) and it's with the government peeps who come up with all the statistics you see bandied about in the news. Unemployment rate, inflation, housing prices, demographics, you name it and they study it. I can't imagine a more boring profession, but the people are fun. I especially like it when they complain about the zillion committees and meetings they have to go through before anything gets done/changed. Ahh, government.

The fridge is pretty much dead. I opened it up as much as I could, cleaned all the coils, left it off for a day and then rebooted it. Same sitch - 48 degrees F. Serge is gonna call someone today to have a look (so he says) since I discovered a little sticker inside that has contact information for the manufacturer. It's only 6 years old this fridge. Yesterday Serge went out shopping for a new one even though I had shown him numerous used ones from the internet he could buy. Let's see, a 9 month old used one for half price? Nah, he prefers the new one with the equal no-interest payments. And this is why I want him to handle it, we do not see eye to eye at all about it. (But I'll surely love whatever the final result is.) Happy hump day peeps!

Monday, June 14, 2010

This and that

So we went out for a five hour stroll yesterday all over town and there were zillions of people everywhere. It was grand prix weekend, the only formula one race in North America, so the city was swelled with rich rednecks. Plus the world cup soccer tournament was on and the poorer locals spilled out of every bar and tavern in town. Couple that with the various festivals going on and it was just impossible not to have your attention drawn all over the place. Plus perfect weather. We sat and had a little coffee after our legs got tired, here you see my hair getting longer. (I haven't had a proper haircut since before Spain at the end of February) I ordered a double espresso allongé and when we were in Spain it was an Americano but when I thought about how I'd order it in English, I was flummoxed. I'm fairly sure we don't say elongated espresso nor American espresso, so how do you order it? Probably the first time I know how to say something in other languages save my own. Oh and check out the look on that lady's face behind me - it looks like she ate a roach or something, lol.

The reason I took this picture is the precarious air conditioning unit way above the patrons on the terrasse below. It kept dripping too which caused the patrons to look skyward and furrow their brows.

As you can see, I've put back the crow sketch, but with this new template, it automatically puts a white border around all my pictures and I can't figure out how to get it off. Serge and I spent a good half hour yesterday trying to find the key code but we couldn't. I have found others with the same problem, but no solutions to it.

We finished up our walk with a couple drinks on the roof of Sky which was packed. Then we came home and had a lovely shrimp and penne pasta dish out on our patio. Georgie had been a good boy and didn't destroy anything, yay! (Sometimes he gets bitter when we leave him alone and he destroys something.) During the walk, I talked with Serge about getting a fridge and it was clear that we did not agree (at all) about the course of action to take. I just want to get another white one, but he is fixated on one day having all stainless steel appliances. Of course once we have them all, it will be a fad past its heyday. Nonetheless, he is adamant. I don't agree with paying hundreds more for something that you have to clean even more. Anyway, I don't care who's side you're on, I came up with a solution. I said, how about if I pay the window that got broken at the other place, and you buy whatever you want. A fridge can be had for the same price as the window, but probably not the fridge he wants. He was thrilled with the idea and I patted myself on the back for helping avoid marital discord. I'll take pics once it happens.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Bummers plus Georgie porn

So much going on this week, and most of it negative, so let's get that out of the way first. Let's see, last night one of the tenants called to tell us their unit had been broken into and all of their valuables stolen. It's worse for them I know, but we had to pay (up the butt) for a new window. Same drill as last time, they put a temporary one in and then in a week or so they come back with the exact replacement type. $600 again.

Then things have been spoiling lately in the fridge so I started to monitor the temperature and it never gets under 47 degrees even when I have it at max. Serge left it open all night one day last week so that may have something to do with it, we're going to try using everything up and then turning it off for a day in case ice has built up on the inside coils. There is no freezer, only fridge ; we have a separate freezer. Anyway, it does produce cold air, just not cold enough. I hope it's fixable and of minimal cost. Experience tells me that such optimism is unreasonable.

I'm writing today at this hour because tomorrow we've got to go to the mother in law's to do a garage sale (see above for impetus) for which we have spent the last couple weekends building a pile. We have to be there at 7:30, which really is a crime on a Saturday. Also in craptastic news this week, the mother in law was diagnosed with cancer and now must face surgery and 9 rounds of chemo. There's no easy or nice or pleasant way to write that previous sentence. I'm just sick about it as is Serge and we're crossing fingers and saying prayers. She goes under the knife in a week. Think nice things please! Or even say some, she's a reader!

Okay, enough bad news. Here's something to make you smile. Georgie had been playing and his bone got up on the piano and he was whining at me to get it. It was soooooooo cute, so I grabbed the camera. When I started filming, as you'll see, he goes and gets the bone without a whimper. After that I get him going though with his plaintant howls. I dare you not to smile.

Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Learning moments

Heard a funny story from one of my students this week. I had been talking about moments of embarassment being excellent learning moments and he came up with this: It seems he was in an interview for a job and since one of the requirements for the position was a solid grasp of English communication skills, part of the interview was conducted in English to confirm this ability. Well. When it came time to switch to English, he was asked the common and simple, "How are you today?" He was tired, but he was more than tired since he had had trouble sleeping the night before and he wanted to convey this. He couldn't quite remember what the word was for "very tired". He took a stab at it though and told the interviewer, "I'm very horny today." The interviewer smiled broadly and asked why that was. My student explained why and then answered a few other questions in English from the interviewer. At the end of the interview, he was told that although his English skills were acceptable, he might want to reconfirm the accepted use of "horny". Imagine his horror upon realizing what he had said! Happy ending though, he got the job. If you could see how serious and conservative this guy is, it would be even funnier. Me, I'll be chuckling for months about it.

My big similar moment came at a restaurant when I asked the waiter if I could move my chair back. The word I was trying to use was "reculer" which means "back up" but what came out of my mouth was "enculer" which means "butt fuck". Really not the same thing at all. At all, at all. But you know, great learning moment as I've never made that mixup again.

And you? Any embarassing learning moments you care to share? Do tell.

Monday, June 07, 2010

Weekend update (boring version)

Good Monday morning to you. Did you have a nice weekend? It was a rainy day yesterday, the steady all day kind, so we had a lazy Sunday blobbing around the house. We had a bit of company in the afternoon, the mother in law and her boyfriend, and we shot the shit for a couple hours while noshing. Saturday we cleaned out the garage, or rather scoured it for garage sale items. It looks like we'll have that sale next weekend, weather permitting.

We weren't very hungry come dinner time, plus we were feeling lazy so I suggested splitting the frozen pizza we had in the freezer. It was a Delissio Hawaiian pizza. When I inspected the nutrition panel I was horrified. The quantities noted were for 1/6 of the pizza so we had to triple the quantities since we were splitting it. 40 percent of the salt for the day so that means 120 percent each! And I'm feeling it this morning too, all bloaty and puffy. Gross. Never will I buy that again. There should be a warning label on such foods.

It's my last full time week of work and then next week I have work-lite and then I'm done done done for the summer. Getting pretty excited about that, but for now I've gotta focus on getting all the classes wrapped up. Time to get going. Have a lovely day peeps!

Saturday, June 05, 2010

A night out

We went to the Cirque du Soleil yesterday to see their new show Totem. It was filled with native tribal imagery and music. It didn't blow me away like the early shows, I think Saltimbanco was my favorite, but there were some awesome feats performed. The one that impressed me the most was where four girls rode tall unicycles all the while tossing bowls onto their heads with their feet. Difficult to imagine I know, and as I watched I wondered who could have dreamt up such a thing. It was so improbable. Very cool though.

Serge liked this hat and though we pondered buying it for Georgie, it was clear he'd have had it in shreds within minutes. It was made of the fabric he loves to tear apart. We got a cute picture out of it anyway. At the intermission we had a soft drink for five bucks each. Such a ripoff. I had lunch on Thursday (general tao chicken - which incidentally I've now dubbed spicy chicken doughnuts) for five bucks. I can buy five liters of soft drink at the market for five bucks. It's just insulting to charge such a price. Next time I'm smuggling.

After the show, we did a kind of date night and went to the new Steak Frites in the village. This is a high end steak house with no liquor license. This concept may be unique to Quebec, the bring-your-own booze restaurants, but it's quite common here and a couple of big chains as well as many small restaurants do it that way. We brought in some wine and shared a delicious côte de boeuf (prime rib) for two. Although it was served with three delicious sauces (and all you can eat frites) I was a bit disappointed that I couldn't get horseradish. The American in me wanted to tell the waitress that there was a market just around the corner, but I zipped it and ate it the way it came.

I'd give you a Georgie pic but he has been the earl of stinkdom the last couple days. Instead of reaching for the camera, we're running screaming from the room holding our hands over our mouth and nose. Disgusting!

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Nada mucho

Do the Georgie pics ever get tiring? Not for me they don't. Sometimes when I love on him the love I feel practically hurts. There isn't really a line between pleasure and pain, it's more like a zone where the two exist simultaneously. My big fear is that he's going to get away from me on one of our walks and get hit by a car. These things happen you know.

I've got a huge day today with 9 hours of teaching lined up. This is insane, but doable since it's only for today. I couldn't do that every day. Well maybe if the money was right. Today's total is a bit over two hundies which really isn't. Three would be more like it.

As for the questions on the last post, the thing on the window is something we bought at home depot. It's a kind of membrane with a design on it that you moisten and apply to the window. It can be taken off and put back on easily. Serge got the bright idea to cut out parts around the edges and he put those parts on another window of the house. As for it looking like spatter, I suppose so from far, but irl it looks more like stained glass. Oh and the reason we didn't drywall it up is because Serge loves light. This is a standard response from him when you ask why about just about anything. Why did you do that honey? Because of the light. I don't press further, I guess it's just a natural response from someone who grew up in the icy North with the long dark winters. Happy hump day peeps.