Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Double trouble

Well it's our turn to get pummeled by snow. I knew it when I looked at that scary satellite picture this morning. They were calling for 2-4 inches but I wasn't buying it. I took public transportation to work because I didn't want to risk having to drive home after a foot of snow fell. So glad I did that because a big dump of snow is what we got. Can't complain though, we usually have far more big snow dump events. I might have actually braved the storm this morning if I had had the van. I feel safer in the van for some reason.



Trouble is, the van was stolen Monday night. I didn't even notice it until I got home from work Tuesday afternoon. I noticed the van wasn't parked there so I figured Serge had gone out someplace. I entered the code to unlock the front door but it wasn't locked. "Uh, hello?" I asked and Serge replied, "Hello," from his office chair. "Where did you put the van? Did you put it in the garage?" I asked. Serge said that it was parked on the corner. "Uh, no it isn't," I replied. After running through all the possibilities including contacting the city to see if it had been towed for some reason, the only possible explanation became theft. So the police came and made a report and basically told us not to hold our breath. At first I felt like I was punched in the stomach but after a couple stiff drinks, we started enumerating the upside. No maintenance costs, no digging it out of the snow, no repairs. And it really was a beater, we had already decided we wouldn't make any major repairs on it and the transmission was doing that telltale clunk when it shifted so I don't think it had that much life left. 1996 is pretty old for a car up here and 230,000km is pretty high mileage too. Farewell to the van.



Finally today, I have this ad I took out of the paper this morning. It's for your basic sex shop but I just couldn't (and still can't) figure out what the thing next to the lube bottle is. Any ideas? It kind of looks like a spoon with a hole in it. You can click on it to enlarge. Wednesday down, two days til the weekend. See you then!

17 comments:

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

Sorry about the van. And I'm afraid I'm no help regarding the ad. WTF?

Sean said...

It's a dildo. They also had an ad on one of the blogs I read -- they seem to pride themselves on function and beauty.

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

Sorry about the van.

As for the picture, is a weird art deco dildo, or maybe some kind of flashy penis wrench? Wow that would hurt...

Mel said...

We didn't get nearly the dump we were expecting, but in anticipation I spent Tuesday night with good friends who live closer to my work and whom I don't see nearly often enough. They're in the process of planning a move up your way this spring or summer, though looking for properties a bit outside the city.

wcs said...

Can you go onto their website and find it?

Jim said...

Looks like th top of a roosters head!!! Not a very tantalizing ad.
Bye bye van...

Birdie said...

I figured out the general function of the toy, but what's with the hole? I much prefer Georgie porn.

I know that sinking feeling you get when you realize your vehicle's been stolen. I've felt it twice. We got most of one car back (switched wheels and empty trunk and dash) and never saw the other again. I'd had it six months.

Patricia said...

Sorry to hear about the theft but I applaud your ability to find the bright side so quickly. I hope the transmission fell out for the theives the very next day.

Mark My Words said...

Sorry about the van.

It's a minimalist dildo.

Luuworld said...

hm. i'm very intrigued by that mystery sex toy. i was thking dildo. but why does it have a hole in the middle?! hm. to be easier to pull out?! hmmm

Anonymous, too said...

Sorry about the van, but I never pictured the two of you riding around in a mommy-van. Then again, it did have dark, tinted windows in back...not that you two innocents would be DOING anything back there ;-) !

The ad shows a high-priced dildo or vibrator (or a close rip-off of one). However, the larger picture made me think it was an ad for lipstick, so I first thought it might be some kind of applicator.

BTW, we got 20.something inches here in the Big Windy. How much did you get?

Anonymous said...

Who steals a 15 year old van? If I was going to risk grand theft auto I would steal a 2011 Cadillac CTS coupe. Are you sure it's not in the impound lot? Ted

GayProf said...

Too bad about the van... Or yay(?). I got kinda mixed messages about it in this post.

As for the object, I don't know its purpose, I a bet it is bluetooth enabled.

rox said...

I agree with Patricia! Hopefully the bastards got five miles away from nowhere and the tranny fell out. Losers.

dr. mo said...

So sorry to hear about the van... Hopefully they're stuck in some snowdrift somewhere.

As for the object, it is so clearly a dildo. I figured the two women kissing in the ad would have been a dead giveaway :)

adarknessinthelight said...

It's a Lelo Insignia Soraya Luxury Dual-Action Waterproof Vibrator. Full sales pitch here

http://m.lovehoney.co.uk/sex-toys/vibrators/luxury-vibrators/lelo-insignia-soraya-luxury-dual-action-waterproof-vibrator/

Can't believe I actually spent time researching that

Anonymous said...

It is a dildo and that isn't a hole in it but a shiny area. Females can use the large end and the handle end can be used as an anal probe. Oh...Uh... how would I know? Ted