Thursday, July 06, 2006

Vacationitis

* The farther you travel from home, the more likely you are wealthier than the local constituency.

* It's true, suitcases shrink when you travel. Maybe they are related to time?

* More money is always spent than what has been budgeted.

* Unless you're trekking in Nepal or Africa or some such place, your bank card is all you need.

* The pictures in your mind are always better than the ones in your hand.

* The same fun can be had, be it 100 miles, 1000 miles or 10000 miles away. That's because vacation is, more than anything, a state of mind.

* Sometimes vacation doesn't lend itself to relaxation. That's okay. Go with it.

* The after vacation glow-slash-sadness is one of the greatest things in life. The definition of bittersweet.

* In England, they call it "holiday".

* Permanent vacation is oxymoronic. Like the first throes of passion and falling in love, the intense feelings of pleasure become, by and by, tempered and flattened.

* You can sometimes get a little burst of "vacationitis" by visiting your workplace on your day off.

* Vacation can induce debauchery. Let it!

* Vacations are also memories to be jumped into again and again:

* The smell of tortillas being made in an open air market of Toluca, Mexico. The roast suckling pig turning on its spit in the window of a Toledo Spain restaurant (the baby head and eyes staring at you). The gyrations of the bartender in Hong Kong as he poured the house special into the waiting mouth of a girl spread out atop the bar (this done from his pants in an oh so thinly veiled recreation of ejaculation - and this to a crowd of screaming westerners).

* The snow crab in Gaspé, the date shakes of Indio, the baguette bought in a village shop in northern France (don't ask me which village, there are a bazillion).

* Tours of Hoover Dam, Heineken factory, the palace of Versailles, Havasupai, the Carlsbad Caverns.

* My body covered by bug bites at Lake Havasu, my brother throwing up in the lobby of a fine Spanish hotel, breaking down in the middle of the desert, the threat of jail while enjoying libations in an Ensenada tavern. (Even disasters provide golden memories.)


* Only one day left and I'm outta here!

31 comments:

Kevin said...

Have a great trip, Mr. World Traveler. I haven't been anywhere in over 5 years (except one weekend to Ft. Lauderdale).

*sigh*

Scott said...

Have a great trip. I love that the Brits call it. 'Holiday.' That's my favorite line from Chicken Run... "Are you going on holiday?"

Steven said...

Ok, that mention of the bartender pouring the drink into the girl's mouth... uh, I'd rather not have what she's having.

Adam said...

Bon Voyage mon ami! Have a good trip. I love the line about the glow/sadness....ahh the sweet melancholy of it all.

Lee said...

Do have fun, dear! Drop us a postcard!

Jason said...

I read somewhere that you should pack half of what you normally would and then double the amount of money you plan on bringing.

Works for me.

St. Dickeybird said...

Have a great time!

Bring back photos and stories.
:)

Bigg said...

Yes, do have a great time and by all means take pictures for the rest of us!

toobusyliving said...

Have a great trip, and please know that I have a love for tacky postcards!

dirk.mancuso said...

Have a great (and safe) trip!!

**sighhhhhhhhhhhhh**

We'll miss you.

Lemuel said...

Have a super trip! Take us along: I'm standing in line behind the others above to wait for the great tales when you return!

..and to your vacation mantras, I'll add my fav: "a bad day at the beach is always better than a good day at the office!"

GayProf said...

Of all those places, it goes without saying that New Mexico was your favorite place to visit. No need to respond. We know it’s true.

I hope your vacation induces a tad bit of debauchery!



Be safe!

S. said...

Thanks for the reminder that vacation is a state of mind...not about distance. I am taking the kids on an overnighter to an amusement park...it has been scaled down from a week to one night due to my work ordeal but the kids are excited none-the-less.

Have a great "holiday."

Ed said...

It is so good to know that vacation is a state of mind. I have never ben even 500 miles from my place of birth. Oh my, I won't get depressed, I won't get depressed, I won't ... anyway, you have a safe and wonderful time and tell us about it when you get back.

David said...

After you debauch, be sure to dispose of the plastic bottle accordingly. Or am I thinking of something else?

Rebekah said...

Laughing. To me, that's what vacation is all about.

And no deadlines or meeting times or only-an-hour-for-lunches.


Going to see you so very soon!

Patricia said...

here's hoping you and spouse build many more fabulous memories on your trip.

Who's Askin'? said...

sometimes traveling sucks...you're tired physically and tired mentally from navigating and new culture, new money, new language. and you wonder why the frig you left home in the first place. the benefits of traveling oftentimes don't hit you until you are home and now have these memories of someplace previously unknown to you. that's when it was all worth it.

Spider said...

Hope you both have a WONDERFUL time - and may the "bittersweetness" level be very low when you return!

ink said...

Have fun. Live well. Bring back many great memories from your holiday. ... Then share them with us.

Daniel, the Guy in the Desert said...

memories: the fleabitten hotel in Mazatlan didn't have two beds, so Kirby and I "had" to share. I'm still going to write about that "holyday".

t said...

No doubt about it, everything you said is true.
It's funny how vacation memories include good and bad ones, but even many of the ones that were bad at the time are ones a person can laugh at now (unless it ruined the vacation).
Case in point:
As a teen, I remember tent camping in eastern Tennessee, and at about 9 p.m. our tent filled up with no-see-ums!
We quickly packed everything up and drove until we got into North Carolina, where there was a rest area with a cool breeze...and no no-see-ums.
As miserable as those damn virtually-invisible biting monsters were, I laughed about it after we got home.

Have a great vacation and I hope you have a wonderful time!

Sister Staceypatrick said...

I like this - particularly the pictures comment. Can I tell you the number of times I've taken a camera "on holiday" and not used it because I just know the copies won't be as good as the original!

farmboyz said...

Enough with the tour de l'ouest. Come to New York. There are many people who want to meet you, and much have I to show you.

jeremy said...

Tried to post this last night, but your comment thing was acting wonky . . .
Anyway--
About time--when you're 2 a year is half of your life. When you're 30, a year is 1/30th of your life so, really, an afternoon is forever when you're a kid.
And about the suitcase thing--I still can't figure it out.

Have a great vacay!!

The Wisdom of Wislon said...

Your're very reflective, funny how the bad bits of holidays gloss over with time and are forgotten by the happier bits and you can laugh bout it:)

What's happened to Snooze?- couldn't log on to her site.

Ed said...

So what are those Brazilians doing in France? Don't they have bread in Brazil? I'm sorry I haven't slept since last week, my neighbors enjoy setting off Fireworks until 4:00 A.M.

MEK the Bear said...

* The pictures in your mind are always better than the ones in your hand.

How true is this! Perhaps that's why I never use that digital camera I bring with me everywhere.

MEK the Bear said...

Dang it, commented too soon.

You guys have a wonderful time! And bring us all back a little souvenir!

The_Gay_Dude said...

Have a great vacation!

anabel said...

* The after vacation glow-slash-sadness is one of the greatest things in life. The definition of bittersweet.

Got a big dose of this one today.