Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Poo happens

Okay, I am not making this up. True, I could be silent on the matter, but that's not like me.

It's not totally my fault though, it seems that poo things keep happening. First, I wake up in the middle of the night with HORRIBLE cramps in my gut, I think I'm going to die, but wait, maybe it's just a BIG POO coming down the pipes, and OUCH ARGH, I slog out of bed and plant myself on the bowl, to try to coax something. It was a grueling 5 minutes and finally the sphere exited. It felt like I'd had a baby. Then back to snoozing.

Then yesterday, I took Sara out for a walk and she snarfled up some little dog poo (she loves little dog poo, I don't know why) before I could stop her. THEN, not 10 minutes later, I caught her snarfling up remnant floating turds in the toilet. (I'm blaming spouse for that, though he would surely disagree) Gah! How can I love my pooch when she does such disgusting things? No kisses for her for a week at least.

19 comments:

Cincy Diva said...

They say if your dog is eating poo, it's because they are missing some nutrient in their diet...perhaps vitamin P?

dan said...

No kisses for her for a week at least....?!!! AH ! AH !..ten minutes...

Lemuel said...

Our last dog would eat her dirt. Disgusting! (But I agree with Cincy - I've read that it is an indication of something missing in the diet).

Still, ya gotta love 'em!

Dantallion said...

Enviromentalism is everywhere these days - now even Sara is recycling.

David said...

Yet another romantic and elegant post.

Rebekah said...

Oh man, something is in the air. Charlie was being gross today too. Although, I don't think it was intentional.

Ed said...

Everytime I see a dog licking all over a persons face I think of just where that tongue has been. A local restaurant used to have a poodle in the kitchen which was allowed to lick all of the plates. They were then washed but I can't stand the idea of a poop eating ass licking tongue all over my dishes or face. At least not a dog's tongue.

Patricia said...

wow, uhmmm, that's just all really gross.

and i'm waiting for someone who's actually had a baby to get you on that comment, heh.

Polt said...

"Felt like I'd had a baby!"

Man, I've been there once or twice, you have my sympathy.

HUGS...

Steven said...

You know how I love a good poo story, but that was just nasty.

Remind me to never let Sara kiss me.

Jason said...

Ok, way too early for that story.

GayProf said...

Maybe both you and Sara need more fiber.

Curtis said...

That's it. I am SO never going to read you at lunch time again.

Lewis said...

I can't say for sure if I'll ever read one of your posts again. I mean, I am one dude that will talk about anything.....no limits....no nothing. But this has me nauseated. A "sphere"? You are lucky to have ever walked again.

Jen said...

As a nurse I pride myself in being ungrossoutable. You favoured blogger accomplished the impossible. And, I second the fibre comment combined with more water intake.

Normlr said...

When I've had spherical problems in the past, I'd take some great fibre supplement from Shoppers Drugmart. It's a very easy to take pill that doesn't get lodged in your throat or require 300 glasses of water like Metmucil. Also works if you find you're going too much. I'll let you know when I find it.

When in Rome.....

dawn said...

My dog loves some poo as well. Not his own though, because he has standards.

I actually go in after it and dig it out of his mouth. Which I'm pretty sure makes me the stupid one.

Mark in DE said...

OH MY GOD! It appears I am living your life the day after you do. Since you posted this on Wed morning, it must have happened on Tues night (your cramps) and Wed morning (Sara's poo eating). However, I had the exact same experiences on Wed night and Thurs morning!

Last night I was awakened by terrible cramps that made me cringe in pain. I resolved the issue the same as you. Then today while walking the dog she attempted to eat another dog's poo, which is not unusual for her - she's always hoping to find poo that's not been picked up by a dog owner. Our dog will eat her own or any other dog's poo, as well as litter box morsels if permitted. I don't know why. I am usually able to prevent it, but sometimes she finds other dogs' poo before I find it.

But that is SO WEIRD that I had the same experiences as you, just a day later. Maybe I should stop reading your blog so often.

Mark

Lacey said...

This blog is the shit.