Friday, September 07, 2007

Return of snippets

* I'm a firm believer in "if it isn't broken, don't fix it." Spouse, however, thinks everything needs fixing.

* Once, spouse noticed the empty space in the top of a lavalamp. He opened it up and topped if off with water. It exploded, naturally.

* Spouse and I bet $1 that gay guys can't donate blood. (I said they can't, because we are forbidden to donate in the US.) Turns out I was wrong. Canada has no problem accepting homo blood. UPDATE: It turns out spouse was wrong. Ha! Thanks to this here internet thingy, a lovely commenter set us straight. If you are male and have had sex with another male since 1977, you are not permitted to donate. This, even though every single sample is screened for HIV anyway.

*Pork and beans are served at breakfast in Quebec.

* One of my fondest childhood memories is that of designing, building and then flying kites with my dad. All you need is balsa wood, garbage bags and glue.

* I adored playing rhummy with mom too, even though she never let me win.

* It's hard to believe I'm sure, but I never talk about poop in English class.

* 20 years ago, I lived for the day. Now, I am very protective of tomorrow. Moderation today ensures a smooth tomorrow. Sigh. I'm so old.

* I read that if you quit smoking before the age of 45, within three years life expectancy returns to nearly that of a lifelong non smoker. I'm 42. There's still hope.

* When our friend Bob came to visit, he looked at me, aghast, and said, "You always have the same shoes." He was trying (unsuccessfully) to hide his revulsion. True, I admitted. I've bought the same sneakers four years in a row now. Apparently, this would be unthinkable for him.


Lemuel said...

I used to donate blood regularly, until I "found myself", rather than lie or confess my sexual habits, I quit donating.

Kites: we used paper grocery bags instead of (plastic?) garbage bags. I loved to make my own kites! They even flew!! But don't forget string and some old rag strips for a stabilizing tail.

As you have hopes for me ;) , so I have hopes for you and spouse that entail recovered life expectancy. If I thought you two would really do it (successfully), I'd almost be willing to make you a deal. Unfortunately I know that you could go back on the deal, and I could not. :)

Ed said...

Nearly that of a lifelong non-smoker. Nearly being the operative word. Same shoes last four years. If it ain't broke don't fix it.
Don't say Poop in class one student will say it is not what we are supposed to talk about and another one will vomit.

CoffeeDog said...

Maybe you should talk about poo in class, since OTHER topics are obviously not to their liking.

GayProf said...

I used to lie in order to donate blood. Then I realized that was just upholding institutional homophobia. If they don't want my blood, so be it.

I have very few different shoe options. I have also been known to "repeat purchase" the same shoe again. Perhaps I also think "if it isn't broke..."

Snooze said...

I love your friend Bob's reaction. I would have thought the same if a friend of mine always wore the same shoes.

I didn't know that lava lamps could explode!

Cooper said...

Oh, I should look up a kite recipe!

Polt said...

The lava lamp story had me giggling like a schoolgirl! :)


Dantallion said...

Spouse's lavalamp experience is classic. Absolutely classic.

Patricia said...

i think i want to borrow serge for about a week. i can't imagine how many projects would get completed. do you rent him out? :)

i buy the same shoes because they are the most comfortable. why would i wear something less comfortable just for the sake of change?

you must make it a goal to talk of les poops in class.

once again, canada is getting it right. (except for the pork and beans part, that's just weird.)

Jason said...

What kind of sneakers? I'm on a shoe kick (bad pun) lately.

The Wisdom of Wislon said...

some guys just don't do 'shoes' my other half as 3 pairs to his name and that's alot for him :>)bless his cotton socks

Earl Cootie said...

We made our kites from newspapers and old yardsticks. We'd fight over who got to use the Sunday funnies.

Erica said...

I found a pair of sneaks that I like, so I keep buying the same ones every time I need new ones...I'm terrified that they'll discontinue them and I'll have to find something else, so last time I bought two identical pairs and keep one pair in the closet for when the current pair wears out.

Apparently, I'm a freak.

David said...

* Always knew it as "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."

* Hysterical

* As soon as I can, I am going to Canada to donate blood.

* Ew

* Never flew a kite

* My grandma was a fierce competitor

* I do not believe it

* Old? How about mature?

* One can always hope.

* I would if I could, but I often can't find what I bought the previous time. I wait so long between purchases.

Ed said...

I may have told this story before. I went to the bloodmobile with a "friend" and we both told the inquisitor we weren't gay. We laughed and joked and when we were lying there dripping blood into a bag he reached over and held my hand. You would have thought we had malaria. The nurse came running up and said these two samples will need a full inspection. She did still take the blood and I would have hoped they run all tests on all donations.

Frank said...

As I live somewhat near the border can I go up to Vancouver and donate blood? If so, cool!

Beans for breakfast-- yes. It's not uncommon in the UK and Ireland. I picked up the habit there. They go great with eggs and toast.

Fixing the lava lamp! That really brought a laugh.

Lewis said...

What? No shit in front of the kiddies. their loss.

daveincleveland said...

that is way too funny about the lava lamp...i would have loved to been there and watched his face when that expolded.....i am sure you got a good chuckle out of that one and sweetie you have no idea about old...i wish to shit i was still 42.......i am past old.....i am freekin ancient.........but the body still thinks its 25

John said...

Males who have sex with males cannot donate blood in Canada.

I'm sure Hema Quebec has the same policy since a student group at McGill continues to raise the issue.

You might want to get that loonie back.

bob said...

Beans and toast is a staple over here. At first I cringed and now I'm completely converted.

Y. U. M. m

Enemy of the Republic said...

I love your snippets!

David said...

I cannot tell a lie to the blood doners, as it makes me feel I'm less of human. ironically, I have O blood, the one almost everyone can use in a pinch.

But, I cannot give. And will not unti this policy changes.

Daniel, the Guy in the Desert said...

I was lost in amazement the day that I learned that in France, it is considered normal behavior to ingest vegetable soup for breakfast.

Lost in amazement, I tell you.