Saturday, August 02, 2008

Right next to the junk

I love the quiet of Saturday morning. Normally at this time, traffic is getting backed up on our street, one of the main thoroughfares leading downtown. But on the weekend (Did you know that in Britain they say "at the weekend"? It's true. They don't say "at Saturday" though so for me, they're saying it wrong) the street has one car passing a minute, if that. The loudest noises are the birds this morning, and it sounds like there's some crow and seagull hubbub a couple blocks down. It feels like I woke up too early, but it's not all bad, I was just in time to catch sunrise.

The spa day went well. I told the massage therapist that I didn't want ANY pain, and just like that, I didn't have any. At the end, I asked her, "So is that called "Massage Lite"?" She told me no, it was Suédois Détente, which of course is Swedish Relaxation. It's always troublesome for me when the masseuse gets to the upper thigh area, massaging right next to the junk. It seems to turn on some kind of sexual button, her fussing about down there, and then it's hard to enjoy because of the turned-on-but-not-appropriate-to-be-turned-on-situation. It's complicated. And I wonder if all those hyphens were necessary.

The best part of the man's package was the facial. I loved everything about it except the part at the end where she showed me the essential products that I need to use on my face daily, weekly and monthly. The five products came to over $200 were I to have bought them. I'm thinking it'll just be cheaper to go once a month to get a facial. And definitely more fun.

This is the big gay celebration weekend. It's not gay pride yet, that organization has split and will be doing a parade in a couple of weeks. This is the divercité celebration for LGBT and their friends. Which is essentially everyone right? Do you know what's missing up here during these gay gatherings? No protesters. No wingnuts shouting about Adam and Steve, no prosceletizing (I'm astonished I spelled that right on the first try) and no bullhorning. Just a bunch of people enjoying the outdoor festival with music, libations and dancing. See all you locals there later for Mascara....

14 comments:

Lemuel said...

Gee, we even had wing-nuts at our small town, postage stamp sized celebration. Enjoy the diversity!

CoffeeDog said...

Yeah, the wingnuts seem to have subsided over the years. So much sin the world, they are busy.

Anonymous said...

Who-cares-if-all-of-those-hyphens-were-necessary? It's your blog and you can damn well put a hyphen any place you want to.
Here they still picket stores owned by Gays. They have passed amendments to the state constitutions to prevent the right to be equal and marry in some states. The College town nearby used to have Gay Pride parades and get togethers at a park every June but now they have forced the Homosexuals underground and intend to make it illegal to be born Gay. They say they are working hard on a method of telling when a fetus will be born Gay and have it aborted. This is odd because they claim to be against abortions. Time to get off my soap box and go take a dump. ed

Greg said...

It sounds like the man's package has you feeling very serene today. Cool.

It's good to be up extra early once in a while. I figure a few sunrises a year are good for my soul.

Enjoy the weekend, it sounds like fun! Especially without the wingnuts!!

Java said...

How utterly cool to have a gay get-together with no protesters. Canada is looking better and better. Of course it's summertime now. It might not look so good in 5 or 6 months. :)

When I was working I saw the sunrise every day. I loved it. That was one of the best parts of my job. So why don't I get up that early now? Lack of discipline, probably, if I want to be honest with myself. Which I don't.

GayProf said...

Sometimes I wonder if the general population in the U.S. realizes how out of step this nation is with the rest of the industrialized world. Or maybe they do know and consider it a misplaced point of pride. Sigh.

Butch said...

I had to hoist my over productive mind out of the gutter when I read she was "massaging right next to the junk," only to see in the next paragraph that "the best part of the man's package was the facial." Sorry, my puerile mind took over on the association. In any event, glad you enjoyed it. (come to think of it, ( sorry, yet another puerile attempt at humour ) a $200.00 facial sounds about right in today's market. ;-)

I'll go back to my corner now and behave.

franck said...

Hyphens are like shoes and chocolate, you can never have too many.
And I, too, had to readjust (my mind) when I read about the man's package.

Polt said...

"The best part of the man's package was the facial." I am sorry, but the double entendre in this sentence coupled with my sophomoric sense of humor had me giggling like a drunken schoolgirl right here at work. For a protracted period of time.

Thanks for making my day. :) Even if it was unintentional.

HUGS...

David said...

Hmm, my dictionary has it as "proselytizing." Maybe that is the French spelling?

I also became a grade school boy with the line about the facial.

They do try and get you with the products at the end, don't they?

Anonymous said...

I was going to comment on "proselytizing," too, but don't need to now.

And no mention of smoking, either. That must mean you've turned-the-corner. CONGRATS !!

Mike

Snooze said...

I hate that upsell of products at the end of a facial. the spa day sounded like bliss though

travelling, but not in love said...

We do indeed say 'at the weekend'. But if we are talking about things we like to do most saturdays or sundays then we would say 'of a weekend, I like to...'.

Some people do say 'on the weekend' but we tend to cast them out along with the people who insist on saying 'less' when they actually mean 'fewer'.....

Mark in DE said...

Polt and I should have run into each other, since our minds were both in the gutter. I laughed out loud at your sentence "The best part of the man's package was the facial."

Mark :-)