Friday, April 21, 2006

Snippetry

* Here's the problem with "save the best for last": What if you die first?

* Wanting to be taught is not the same as wanting to learn. Only those wanting to learn can be taught.

* I often used to think, "I hate it when that happens." I realized that my worldview was too often filtered through the "I hate" lens. So I made a conscious decision not to let my thoughts go there. Now I often think, "I love...." And because of that, I have become a different person.

* In Los Angeles, people coat their homes with stucco. In Montreal, it's all brick and stone. Can't do the bricks in LA because of earthquakes, can't do the stucco in Montreal because of winter. (oh, and it's a law too in both places.)

* Satisfaction is not a normal human condidtion. It must be learned and practiced.

* If a woman wears a shirt with writing on the front, I figure she wants me to look at her breasts.

* If a man wears a shirt with writing, I figure it's because he wants to look at the breasts of the girls reading him.

* Sometimes I think the earth is ready to shake us off, like a dog after a swim.

* Toejam is an urban legend.

18 comments:

nongirlfriend said...

I think the earth is ready to shake us off, too.

I love the shirt thing!

Kevin said...

I figure if God didn't want people to look at women's breasts, he wouldn't have invented them.

Same thing goes for a huge bulge in a guy's pants.

Snooze said...

Toejam is real. I'll mail you some.

S. said...

Where do you get this stuff? Too funny!

St. Dickeybird said...

I Like #1. It will stick.

And toejam is real, but it's not really jam. Buy new socks and you'll see.

Jason said...

Ugh, what made you think of toejam so early in the morning? And I agree with st.dickey, especially new dark socks.

Patricia said...

i tend to think that satisfaction is our default position. we're born oozing it from our pores. and then we "learn" and are taught to ignore the gentle nudges, the clear signs that remind us that we are capable of feeling satisfied.

Dantallion said...

No stucco in Mtl is law? Municipal? Cuz I know a few places on the island that have broken that particular rule.

Em said...

Wow, I love what Patricia wrote. What a great reminder.

"coating a home" seems different than "facing a home". I like your phrase, it makes my brain look at it differently.

Could you define toejam? Isn't it that stuff that gets trapped in the corner of toenails? What. It is there sometimes. What is so urbanish about that?

Steven said...

Ok, I'll try to be more positive...

I love getting the stomach flu! It just melts the pounds away! It's better than mono!

GayProf said...

So I made a conscious decision not to let my thoughts go there. Now I often think, "I love...."

This is something I really, really, really need to work on for myself.

tornwordo said...

I don't think sock lint under toenails counts as Jam.

You know what jam looks/feels like? It doesn't resemble the dark sock thing. IMHO, lol.

Yes, it's a law in Mtl, but people do ignore it. The law says that the outside must be in masonry (perhaps you are permitted to "stucco" an existing brick wall, though for example.)

Jason said...

We could all use that law against stucco. Blech!

_Psycho said...

Hmm I didnt knew that was a law, strange !

You have a lots of ideas, wonder where you take all that =P

t said...

Doesn't it feel good to let go of the "hate lens"? If someone or something really pisses me off, I do still go there (it's hard not to when you're Italian). But it happens very infrequently now.
My mother taught me to look at the bright side of life. If something wasn't going my way, she'd say,
"Oh, don't worry about it! What's the worst that could happen?"
And...chances are...I was making a big deal over nothing.
And usually the worst didn't happen anyway.
Life goes in cycles. If things don't go your way, they will sooner than you think.

Freak Magnet said...

I like the whole "lens" thing, too.

Holly said...

i can't speak for toejam, but i know bellybutton lint exists. My husband could knit sweaters from that shit.

toobusyliving said...

here's Jimmy