Friday, November 14, 2008
Still loving on her
Here's a picture taken long ago by a friend of a friend that we befriended on a trip to California. He later sent us a blow up of this shot. Serge scanned it and cleaned it up as a souvenir of our beloved Sara. I was terribly broken up about it when we put her to sleep and cried frequently for five days. Then I was good and didn't leak a tear for a week. I thought I had finished with the crying when I had some maudlin moments and cried anew a week after I had stopped. Then night before last, she visited me in my dreams. It was so strange because in the dream I knew she was dead and gone but was just visiting me from the other side. (even though I don't believe in any doggy heaven nonsense) We frolicked and rolled around loving on one another. Squeezing and licking and playing and loving. When I woke up yesterday, I was thrilled to have had such an encounter and it gave me one of the best mood days I've had in years. I know she's gone, but the love I have for that girl will never be extinguished. Plus that dream righted me somehow. Now when I see a picture of her my heart squeezes love whereas a few days ago it squeezed sadness. I can't help but feel like she really visited me.