Part 1 Part 2
Warning: this story is graphic in its depiction of homosexual intimacy. If you are easily offended by such illustrations, please do come back another day.
As before, Eric found no one in the restroom when he entered, and so he went to the only stall which had no door. He pulled down his pants and sat down. He heard Gary come in. Both of the human hearts in the room were beating a stacatto rhythm, fueled by anticipation. Gary approached the urinal and let out his already rigid penis and began stroking it. Eric looked through the hole, and again, even as his loins were on fire, it felt like his stomach wanted to be in his mouth. He began to stroke himself too and turned away for a moment. Gary, on the other side of the divider, knew the boy must be there but had neither heard nor seen any usual sign of interest. Normally these would come in the form of either a sound or a movement from inside the stall. Eric, ecstatically terrified, more paralyzed than anything else, was as quiet and immobile as possible. Only his breath finally gave him away. Gary thought he heard the breathing and decided to verify. He bent down and peered into the hole.
Eric turned back again to look through the hole and saw a huge eyeball peering through. Whump! Shame sprang to life and spread out over his body like a million itchy bugs, if only he could disappear. He quickly pulled up his trousers and stood up and it felt like the blood would pass through the pores of his face. And then Gary appeared before him. It was really only a couple of steps, but the implications were enormous. Here stood Gary, with his dick out and erect, and a cornered, but out of his mind thrilled teenage boy not knowing what to say or do. "Can I see your dick?" asked Gary simply. He wasn't entirely sure if Eric had reached the crucial age yet, and needed to verify. Eric exposed his own brand of concrete. "Would you like to go for a drive? I'm Gary." Eric replied simply, "Eric" and nodded his affirmative answer. "Wait here a minute and I'll drive around to the corner, you come out and wait and I'll pick you up." Eric waited and pondered what he was doing. This was big, this was exciting, this was very scary. Ways to get out of it crossed his mind and thoughts of "What am I doing?" made the shame burn more strongly. It was inevitable though, the driving lust for knowing led him out the door and over to the corner to wait for Gary.
In the car alone, Gary had his own struggle. "What the hell are you doing, he can't be a day over 13, you can go to prison for this!" And then the rationalisation, "But the boy wants it too, there is nothing wrong, as long as we don't get caught." (I'd like to point out that in this part of the story I am not going to go into the bitterness coming up as I write. Because where we can forgive a thirteen year old poor judgement, we should not forgive the adult in this situation who does. Or should we? I know, I know this is what my therapist is for.) Waffling back and forth in his mind, there was finally no question once Gary saw the tall blond boy waiting for him at the corner. He slowed down and pulled over and Eric jumped in, ready for adventure.
10 comments:
I echo nongirlfriend.
Wow.
Zoinks!
(My word of the week!)
Yikes. I don't know what to say yet until I hear how this ends.
I know, I know this is what my therapist is for
Your therapist and your friends. We are by your side.
You are brave to share this story about yourself.
I love that you are sharing this story and am totally hooked. Besides great storytelling, what interesting implications and moral questions simmer underneath that hopefully help us all to reflect a little. Thanks.
This story is riviting. It reminds us of similar happenings in our early sexual years, how we handled them, and what we might have done differently. Exciting to hear of your experience!
Whoa. I just started reading your blog and I come in at the best time. Juicy, juicy, juicy.
No pun intended, but since it fits...
Because I too have been in similar circumstances, I can understand the fear, trepidation and the conflicting sexual intrigue. I applaud you for writing this as I cannot.
Can I ask if you were attracted to men before this, or were you undecided?
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