Friday, January 12, 2007


* A couple of recent teasers on CNN - "Pat Robertson has said God has spoken directly to him and he has dire predictions." (This is news?) "Foreclosures are on the rise, coming up "Mortgage Meltdown", learn how to make sure it doesn't happen to you." (I'm guessing paying the mortgage would prevent foreclosure.)

* Spouse told me a joke last night and we both fell into a fit of laughter, tears streaming down face, stomach muscles cramping and pee spotting. The joke was in French and is visual, otherwise I'd tell it to you.

* Funkifying: in the process of becoming stinky/rotten.

* Nude dancer's ex wife came poking around yesterday. She has no news either. He owes her child support. Sigh. He's running away from it all it seems.

* At Starbucks, the bagel and cream cheese costs less than a coffee.

* This site is a real time fritterer. I love it.

* How many gay guys does it take to come up with the lyrics for MTM's theme song? (See yesterday's comments for answer.)

* It looks like my classes' start times have been pushed back another week. Normally, I'd be thrilled about another week to fart around, but desperate finances are zapping the thrill.

* I finished "Letter to a Christian Nation". I'm back to my original thinking that religion is for the weak of mind. (Not spirituality, but religion with all the labels and inherent righteousness.)


Snooze said...

There's nothing better than the type of shared laughter you describe.

Timmy said...

Pat Robertson says that your blog is gonna die!

Happy Friday Torn!

Anonymous said...

So, there's this joke .. that's hysterical ... but I can't show you ... and it's in French ... but it's really funny.

Believe me.


Lemuel said...

I never stop by that I am not taught something new, amused, or challenged to take a good look at myself. Today I hit the jackpot, because I found all three. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

That's the book I'm going to buy with my Chapters gift certificate. Great suggestion.

teh l4m3 said...

Pat Robertson has said God has spoken directly to him...

I think at this point we can safely ascribe it to senile dementia.

Craig said...

At the risk of beating the MTM show song to death, here are the complete lyrics (Ed & Gayproof were both a little off yesterday-yes I'm gay):

Artist: ("Love is All Around" by Paul Williams) Lyrics

Who can turn the world on with her smile?
Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?
Well it's you girl, and you should know it
With each glance and every little movement you show it

Love is all around, no need to waste it
You can have a town, why don't you take it
You're gonna make it after all
You're gonna make it after all

How will you make it on your own?
This world is awfully big, girl this time you're all alone
But it's time you started living
It's time you let someone else do some giving

Love is all around, no need to waste it
You can have a town, why don't you take it
You're gonna make it after all
You're gonna make it after all

seekeronos said...

Even as one of the members of the Vast Evil Right Wing Conspiracy...

Pat Robertson gives me a cold chill. I mean, why would God give Pat divine revelation when He hasn't done that for anyone in nearly 2,000 years...

As for (the USA) being a Christian nation... that's worth a good laugh. Just because someone says that they are a "Christian" or was born of "Christian" parents doesn't make him one.

At best, we are a secular nation that embraces certain aspect of Judaism and Christianity, wth a few more yahoos who have polticizd thier Christianity well beyond what the Gospel calls for, than an actual (rather small) minority of Bible-believing Christians content to follow thier Lord and live at peace with thier neighbors.

Patricia said...

oh sure, tease us with the prospect of tears, cramping stomachs and spot peeing and then don't tell us the joke. nice.

and i thought i was sad to know about nude dancer's cat. now i find out he also has children.

GayProf said...

How many gay guys does it take to come up with the lyrics for MTM's theme song? (See yesterday's comments for answer.)

Well, it is one of our sacred texts.

I am with Patricia -- Knowing that ND had a cat was bad, but children?!? Great to know that he is screwing over tons of innocent people with his self-centered approach to life.

David said...

I know the world's funniest joke but it is completely told in sign language, so I can never share it with you.

So there.

Pat Robertson prophisied last year that the hurricanes would be worse than Katrina the next time around. Whoops, guess God was just pulling his leg.

Ed said...

Say Torn, could you put the joke on Video?
I remember a few years ago when Pat Robertson Lied on God and said God told him to run for President. If God had truly told him to run for President he would have won.
I agree with you in the beginning there was only one religion. All the different religions were created by men to sastisfy their own wishes and desires.

madamerouge said...

playing with sand like that is very zen

Doug said...

I have a feeling we're gonna see nude dancer on the news sometime. It ain't gonna be pretty.

Ed said...

At least I'm not a nancy boy because if I were I'd even know the words to Golden Girls. Thank You for being a friend. Travelled down the road and back again. Your heart is true your a pal and a confidant. If you threw a party and invited everyone you knew, you would see the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached would say thank you for being a friend.

Em said...

Ed made me laugh.

Yeah, those poor kids. It makes me feel sad for them.

Also I think you should post S telling the joke. The worst that could happen is that we all go, "what?". And he would still be cute.

Anonymous said...

Whew! I was just about to get foreclosed on, but you swooped in just in time to tell me how to avoid that. Thanks for the help!

If you are running low on cash maybe you can go pick up a couple of nude dancer's shifts, I'm sure he's flaking out on going to work too.

Anonymous said...

Damn it, that sand website is fun!

dirk.mancuso said...

The Nude Dancer epic just seems to grow worse by the millisecond. Seriously, how badly can one person eff up their own life and the lives of others just by being in proximity to him?

I have never had Starbuck's coffee, nor have I ever had a bagel and cream cheese .

Pat Robertson...religious folks are just all kinds of sad.