Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Bubble bursting

Answers to yesterday's post:

1. I have been sexually harassed by a male boss. True! It happened a few times, always when trapped in an elevator with the guy. One day, I decided to turn the tables on him (what the hell, I was single) and he freaked out, lol.

2. I successfully fasted for three days while working in an ice cream shop. True! I was 17 or 18 at the time. It was one of the most difficult experiences I've lived through. When I broke the fast, it was with a plain cone (no ice cream in it). To this day, it is one of the most delicious taste experiences I've ever had. And I have ordered plain cones for my ice cream ever since.

3. I have had sex at work. False! I have never done it at work. Too stressful! Way to go Ed, lemuel, JP and tt.

4. I have been fired for embezzlement. True! I knew this would trip everyone up. Sometimes, I like to burst people's squeaky clean bubble about me. I was in my early 20's and worked at this place. A gang of us servers had the perfect scam going, pocketing cash sales.(Taught to us by one of the manager's sisters - ah what a soap opera that place was.) It was a complicated manouvre but we went undetected for over a year. The owners were treacherous and stupid. (Later, when I became a boss, I remembered these guys and what not to do when managing people. When you treat your employees badly, they steal from you.) This made stealing easy on the conscience. Their lamest move - didn't want to spring for a computer system. All tickets were hand printed. In the end, I took the fall because I had become lax and left around some incriminating evidence. (I think I felt most guilty about that - ruining the scam for the others.) When confronted, I quit, saying I would reimburse the $ amount on the evidence and that I had no explanation for it. I would have been fired anyway. It's embarrassing to admit, and certainly not something I feel proud of. Also, having learned from the experience, I'm grateful for it.

5. I have quit my job while throwing my uniform in the boss's face. True! While working at this place. The boss, who was also a friend, cut my hours in half one week to accomodate another friend of hers. I told her that was bullshit, announced my quitting while squirming out of my uniform shirt, and threw it in her face. Later, at home, I called her up to apologize. She asked, "Does this mean you still want your job?" I said, "No, but it was wrong of me to throw my uniform in your face. That was unprofessional of me."

Now. In honor of blog action day for the environment, I'll go ahead and purport some of my beliefs on the subject. Basically it's this: The more we pump unnatural chemicals into the seas, atmosphere and earth, the closer we get to rendering a major readjustment of life on the planet. The more we deplete the limited resources, the closer we are to collapsing many of the engines of our society. Look, if you put a drop of poison in a fish tank every day, eventually all the fish will die. It's a closed system this planet we're living on, and for this reason, it should be on everyone's mind in their daily activities. Use less, conserve more, recycle. Compost (which I've yet to start) carpool, use public transport, turn off the lights when you leave the room. It's not all that much when you make it a habit. So......make it one!

Oh and Happy Birthday Cooper!

17 comments:

CoffeeDog said...

I want to hear the process you used for embezzeling! (sp?)

We compost, and I love it. It's very satisfying to watch waste turn into dirt. I used a bunch of it this spring to plant some shrubs.

Lacey said...

So, I was right.

Lemuel said...

Woo-hoo! I usually suck at 4 Truths and a Lie.

As I read your explanation of #4, I sat and nodded. Not only did it fit with my (good) impression of you and the way you live life, but it carried a message of truth to managers and bosses everywhere: "you get what you pay for", i.e., if you treat your employees like sh*t, they will respond in like manner in their work habits. I am always curious when I hear managers complain about how bad their workers are. I usually suspect that the workers are only holding up a mirror to the manager.

Snooze said...

Good points on the environment. I think we're all so spoiled though that we're doomed.

Love your confessions!

Doug said...

Funny how being in charge thinks managers can do anything they want.

And yes, I did have a squeaky clean image of you. ;)

Excellent point about our planet: we're a closed system (just a really big one). Thanks for posting!

Chunks said...

Damn!

Cooper said...

I couldn't have resisted the ice cream for three days! You're made of stronger stuff than me!

Excellent environmental points! So many little things we can all do which make a collective difference.

Thanks for the birthday shout-out!

Petie said...

What the sexual harassment you had to endure??

Billy said...

First 'click' trought! Great reading.

Try living in a Third World country and talk about recycling and 'waste' management...

Will be back!

GayProf said...

First the strawberry, now the embezzling. I don't know you at all...

Patricia said...

well crap.

Enemy of the Republic said...

Wow. First you fell from the pedastal, then crawled right back up. What have I done to equal your magnificient deeds? Yes, I threw the uniform at my boss's face, no I never had sex at work, I don't think I have been sexually harassed and I haven't embezzled, but I used to sell dope at work in my bartending days. Does that count? Plus it comes from the earth so I will honor blog environment day too.

Steven said...

I haven't seen any mention of it, so I hope you didn't have to do any time for the embezzling. I was wrongly accused of it in 1995, but rightfully cleared by the feds (HUD) and support of the City Council.

Lessons learned for both of us!

lattégirl said...

Your fish tank analogy is a good one!

David said...

I'm trying to be a bette person for the planet. I'm recycling more than ever, and I've alays turned the light out when I leave a room -that's what night lights are for anyways.

My roommate drives me up the wall with leaving lights on. When I tell him about it, he says he's using the energy efficient bulbs.

I can't seem to convince him that even they use energy, and turning out a light is just a small thing.

Ed said...

That is two Truth or lies I've got right in the last month. My luck seems to be changing!
Here you go Torn: One is a Mouse, two are Mice but One is a house but two are not a hice! One is a Louse and two are Lice, but One is a Spouse yet two are not Spice. (explain this to your students)

Anonymous said...

i guess i'm a few days late but my motto, lie, cheat and steal has always served me well and now that i too am a manager i can counsel future generations on how to be just like me. (well, they may have to learn the stealing on their own but i can certainly turn my head)
viva la resistance! = up yours to the "man" in America.
confessions don't do much for me because unlike you,, i have no guilt about all the bad things i do to people.............
sign me
the big d