Thank god I've got a morning class today. I'll be gone before spouse wakes even. The last few times he's gone off to work, he has had to watch me reading the paper leisurely on the couch. "Have a good day," he says in a way that means "you rat bastard." I can't help feeling a bit guilty. Damn guilt. Why shouldn't I enjoy this down time? The problem is that when I have downtime, I always want to fill it up with something productive. Because if I don't, I might end up reading Harry Potter all day and playing Scrabble on the computer. And then what? Then I will feel like a poor excuse for a human being. To keep me on my toes, Serge arrives home and immediately inquires, "So what did you DO today?" Again, decoding Serge, it means, "you'd better have done something productive." I know this drill though, and I always accomplish a little list of chores for the day, you know, "I went to the bank and made that deposit, picked up a couple things from the market, unloaded the dishwasher, did a load of clothes, oh and I showed the apartment downstairs." I trust him not to make a close inspection of the statement because if he did, he would discover all of 90 minutes accounted for there. Anyway back to the guilt. It just doesn't really work having vacation at home. I can't let myself go into the "vacation mode" since I'm surrounded by everything that reminds me of "regimented life mode". But I'm working on it, I'm working on it.
Wait, am I really whining about being off work? I can feel the WAVES of sympathy from you all, lol.
18 comments:
Every Wednesday at work I must prepare a status report. For weeks in which there is little to do, such reports impel me to do "creative writing". It's not far from giving Serge the impression that it took all day to do 90 minutes of tasks.
Instead of reading Harry Potter or playing Scrabble, I read Sticky Crows. :)
I love being off work with no clear plans. Normally I'm travelling or have so much work to do at home. Enjoy anytime you can just have to yourself.
I did SFA yesterday and feel your guilt. It's good to slack off some days though.
Poor Serge having to head out for work while Torn enjoys the boy wizard.
Speaking of which, how are you enjoying the current one you are reading?
it's like you've been snooping in my windows! i have the same conversation with hubs. and again, i'm serge.
give yourself permission to enjoy your time! i always find lists to be helpful. lists of things to accomplish, both fun and productive. having a balance of both helps me feel like it's okay to goof off and recharge the batteries and yet the whole week doesn't slip through my fingers unnoticed.
Let is go! Breathe! Relax! We'd never make you feel guilty....well, I do hate to use the word "never."
Poor baby!
I think this work ethics shit goes back to those damn Puritans. One should not feel guilty for enjoying life leisurely. Yet most of us, myself included, do. It's as if we are conditioned to measure our worth on how much we get accomplished each day. Reading a book, watching tv, going to a movie, staying in bed, taking a nice walk, or whatever it is we do should be honoured as important, because it was what we wanted to do.
Here's a idea, torn. When Serge comes home each day, have a nice dinner and favourite drink awaiting him. When he asks what you've done all day, tell him you've been slaving away in the kitchen and have been waiting with great desire for his return. Then shower him with kisses.
Don't fret Torn just enjoy your time off. Roll out those lazy, hazy, crazy days of Summer, you'll wish that summer could always be here...
There's more to life than productivity. Somehow you need to Bardelf's ideas sound pretty good.
Enjoy anyway!!
I love to see spousal communication at work...
When I worked at an office, it seemed like most people did about 90 minutes of work per day anyway (despite being there 8 hours).
Enjoy the time. Read about the boy wizard. Fix a cocktail. You'll be back at work sooner than you think.
I advise you to LOSE the guilt. It is not productive. Enjoy your time off and fill it the way you want!
Slacker
Sometimes you just need to do nothing.
I go insane when I'm off work. I feel like such a waste of space. But then again, wastes of space get to sleep alot and watch hours and hours of TV, so all is not lost.
You mean computer scrabble isn't comsidered productive?
That "must be productive" thing is a double edged sword. It's good for getting things done but also can make relaxing hard because of the guilt.
Usually I think I deserve my sloth like days; recharging and all.
yes, only on weekends can we both feel guilt free in doing nothing - then we complain Sunday night how we each stopped the other from getting what needed to be done that weekend. We had some good mothers to install healthy feelings of guilt in us.
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