Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Kinda all over the place

God, it was gorgeous yesterday. The sky was filled with cotton candy-like cumulus, with strands of precipitation descending from them like hair. The sun played hide and seek behind the clouds and since the angle is so low now, the rays poked through here and there as depicted in so many spiritual paintings. Where's the pictures you must be clucking. And a fine use of your clucking mechanism it is. Unfortunately, I left the camera sitting on my desk at home. That always seems to happen when there's really good stuff to take pictures of.

And I watched Groundhog day again. Only one more viewing left. But yesterday I started pondering what an illusion life is. I mean, no matter what you think you are, no matter how you define or label your characteristics, the vessel that is "you" has the capacity to be very different than how you imagine yourself to be. We humans can get used to anything. I myself have gotten used to many things that at a previous time would have been anathema to my very being. As have you, I'm sure.

And every time a change occurs, we rankle and squawk a bit, but it doesn't last long until we get acclimated and then the next change occurs. Like shifting gears in a car, some of us grumble louder than others. But why? Why do we cling to this or that notion of ourselves? Why do we resist change? Why is it so important to define ourselves?

Too many questions I know. And it always leads me to my problem with fashion. Huh? Non-sequitur? No, not really, because I think the whole fashion business is about defining yourself which causes my stomach to self nauseate. Like why is my drawer filled with black socks and ankle socks when a few years ago it was white? So lame. If you dress in style you're a sheep, and if you don't you are either a rebel or indifferent. Messages all. I hate that. We can't clothe ourselves without sending a message. And yet it's an illusion that we all buy into. Talk about mass hysteria.

This is what happens when you try to crunch out a post before dawn in 15 minutes. Scattered and ill-written. How many times did I use the word "stuff" and "things"? No, don't answer that. I don't want to know.

7 comments:

Lee said...

Well, good fashion is a means to an end, my dear favourite thing. If the price of looking good and feeling fabulous in a new item of clothing, well that's certainly worth the pricetag in my hilariously homosexual eyes.

W said...

Nice blog. Very interesting. we'll visit very often. Congratulations. Big hug from Portugal.

_Psycho said...

stuff and things ? you used them both only once. And I like to use these words. It's laziness 101, you don't have to explain what a "thing" is ;)

You're too much complicated this morning.

Adam said...

I think the 15 minute method is working very well for you. You have had many existential posts in the past but I think this one is the best I've read so far. If you haven't seen it yet you should rent I Heart Huckabees. I think you'll enjoy the topic.

I hate when I leave my camera so now I take it with me everywhere. My friends have been warned that I'm going to be that obnoxious person with a camera but they seem to like it.

tornwordo said...

girlfriend: Hey, I can totally relate to the comfort method. The trouble is that your sending a different message, unintentional as it may be. I just wish fashion wasn't even a concept, that's all.
Lee: I like looking good in clothes that accentuate my attributes as much as anyone. The trouble is, fashion seems to "teach" us what looking good is supposed to be.
Psycho: I know, I didn't know what the hell point I was trying to make.
Adam: You're not the first to tell me to see that, I'll pick it up this weekend. Thanks!
t: I know, and I have one more viewing on Thursday. I actually started pondering if the two drunk guys were akin to the chorus in Greek tragedy. And frankly, a case could be made.

r said...

"Why do we cling to this or that notion of ourselves? Why do we resist change? Why is it so important to define ourselves?"

Ah... I love this question. Junior high kids are all trying on different personnas, trying to figure out "who" they are and where they fit in.

What I also find fascinating is how we present just particular parts of ourselves in certain situations.

You know, as bloggers, most people reading our posts have never even met us. We present our best side, what we choose to write, what we choose to let people see. We care about what people comment, and whether or not they "like" us, and get disappointed when there are few or no comments.

And it's all an altered reality.

epicurist said...

Very interesting post. I really didn't think it was scattered at all.