Tuesday, July 04, 2006

I forgot about Rapture

Let's just assume for a moment that the Aztecs and Mayans were right in that there was no use for a calendar after 2012. According to them, this age comes to an end on the winter solstice of that year. Chillingly, the Aztec calendar also predicted the arrival of of a "white god" on the exact date that Cortéz arrived - many believe that this explains why they didn't put up a fight even though they vastly outnumbered Cortéz's men. The Mayans specifically point to the date 12/21/2012 as when this age ends. Finito. Nada mas. Kablooie.

It certainly seems plausible what with the looming possibility and even statistical PROBABILITY of nuclear war, global warming, bird flu and asteroids. All of these things could end the world as we know it.

So.

What do I want to get done?

All I can come up with is "less work, more play".

Even if the Aztecs and Mayans are wrong, it doesn't seem like such a bad life mentality.

****

Happy fourth of July to all my blood down south! Have fun and eat a hot dog for me!

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's the end of the world as we know it, it's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine! I will certainly try to eat a weiner sounds like good advice to me!

Jack said...

Hi Torn!

I became interested in the Mayan people after my trip to Mexico. I really feel they were/are special.

Do they mention how it happens on 12/21/2012?

Let me know and I'll check it out on my end also.

Happy 4th Torn!

Have fun!

J

The Wisdom of Wislon said...

Spend every day in the Botanical Gardens and party with the plants ti 2012!

Like the hairdo- have fun in California- never been to the US, so he closest I can get to California chilling is by playing some Nancy Sinatra!

St. Dickeybird said...

If the world is ending in 2012, I hope smoking will still be legal here.
All I'll need is 4 hours notice, a nice chardonnay, a pack of Camel Lights, and some oral sex. Then I'll be ready for The Mexican Prophesy.

Spider said...

Damn - if that is the end, I have lots to do before that - cleaning out the closet in my bedroom will take until at least 2009...

Thanks for the good wishes - how is the Jazz festival progressing?

dirk.mancuso said...

Predict-y stuff like this always plays with my mind. I need to crawl under my desk and find my happy place for a while.

And when I come out...no Nostradamus stuff, 'kay?

toobusyliving said...

Happy Fourth!!!

Anonymous said...

I shall eat many a hot dog in hot hot hot Florida! 2012? Scary!

Normlr said...

Wow. You must be psychic. Why just yesterday I was watching this god awful horror movie called Hell's Gate 11:11 and in it they were talking about that exact same thing!

Of course what the Mayans forgot to mention was that at 11:11pm every night in some small town USA an ugly woman with a horrid red wig and camel toe inducing pleather pants will start terrorizing a woman until all her friends are dead and she joins the dark side. That's when you know that the apocolypse is upon us.

A Bear in the Woods said...

The Mayans were heavy into piercing and S&M. They were way into having fun, and didn't seem to set a lot of limits. This endears them to me.
Did you know that Nostradamus and the I Ching predicted that Paris Hilton and Jessica Simpson will elope together on that date? Perhaps so much concentrated essence of blondeness will cause the energy forces of the earth into imbalance, causing the final descent into chaos.

Kevin said...

There. I posted a little something. Just for you.

Normlr said...

I think it's more likely that the combined vastness of their heads will create a black hole so large that the earth will implode.

dawn said...

If the world is ending in 2012 I'm going to eat even more hotdogs for you. Who cares if I'm fat when the world ends?

GayProf said...

Chillingly, the Aztec calendar also predicted the arrival of of a "white god" on the exact date that Cortéz arrived

Historians aren't as sure about this story anymore. After all, who told us that they thought of Cortéz as a god? That would be Cortéz.

Maybe some of the backwoods, uneducated Aztecs thought this, but it seems unlikely that the folk in Mexico City imagined Cortéz as a god. He simply smelled too bad to be a god.

One thing I will say about the Mexica (Aztecs) -- They believed that human sacrifice would ensure the sun rise for the next morning. It always turned out that they were right.

I am not sayin', I am just sayin'.

r said...

Gayprof, I like you.


No hot dogs for me, it's brautwurst baby (and don't fucking ask me how many points that might be!).

Going to the beach to watch the fireworks and then fight the drunken traffic home.

gotta go make my watermelon salad now.

Anonymous said...

Here's some creepy stuff, sorry Dirk, The Bible predicts the end of the world as the generation that sees Jerusalem returned to the Jews (1967) will not pass until all be fulfilled. How long is a generation? Some scholars say 45 years. Hmmm let me see...1967 plus 45 would be oh I don't know...2012?

Lemuel said...

As still a "south of the border guy", I rather feel the same way whenever King George tries to ratchet up the "fear factor" another notch: so what! I want to keep on living - enjoying what I can and helping where I can - and when it ends, it ends.

Adam said...

I ate THREE hot dogs for you. That's how much I love you!

Jason said...

Um... that was so depressing.

dpaste said...

No dogs, but I did have some fried chicken. And a beer.