Monday, March 31, 2008

Anxiousness, happiness

We went back to that store yesterday and bought the table. It won't be ready until the end of June though. The bad part of this is that once we receive it, we're going to want to change all the other furniture too. I keep saying to spouse, this year it's Europe, next year we can think about furniture. (Sometimes I feel like I'm channeling ricky ricardo and spouse lucy) I have been rather a broken record lately about spending. Oh we keep spending, it's just my lamentations have grown more frequent and border on wailing. Seriously, when spouse discovered the unpaid bill for the car registration (Notice: it is illegal for you to drive the car and you expose yourself to a ticket of 3-600 dollars) yesterday, I felt like someone kicked me in the stomach. I wailed. Then the squabbling ensued. See, he pays that bill, so why should I have the strong reaction? This was the source of his frustration. He thinks my reaction is based on the (incorrect) assumption that I think he is unable to handle his bills. I get frustrated with his total lack of stress about money. "We always get through," he says. So I stress for the both of us, he gets irritated at that, and I get irritated that he doesn't get more sensitive to (my) spending issues. Really kind of retarded. Last night I promised that I would try to stop worrying so much. (Those who know me know that's like asking me to become brown-eyed. ) The whole key is sticking to thinking about today, what's right here in front of us. The future holds so many potential disasters if you think about it, so it's really best not to.

There was a happy moment for us Saturday when we went to the store closing of Zellers. Zellers is basically the Target of Canada. Everything in the store was 30% off the lowest marked price. The place was a madhouse with cashier lines snaking way back into the aisles of the merchandise. I got my jeans, three pair, the ones I always buy, my size!, for 10 bucks each. Spouse picked up another set of sheets for the bed for six bucks. (We thought it was going to be 12 bucks and when it rang up at $6 I about peed my pants with excitement.) Oh and they had my reese's eggs, so I picked some of those up too. That's happiness in a wrapper right there.

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

You'll love that table. Why is Zeller's closing? Does it have anything to do with Wal-Mart? Serge said to tell you, "it's only money". I'll add, "don't sweat the small stuff". I'm here to remind you that it is all small stuff. Ed

CoffeeDog said...

Ha, you are Mrs Coffeedog and I am Serge! We had a money talk on Friday night, after I used the Home Depot credit card to buy plants and whatnot. It was under 100 bucks and I'll have it paid off in less than 2 months. but boy did I have to hear the piper play that sad tune of "blah blah, money, interest charges."

However...if we were doing a huge trip then I might try to change my spending habits a little, to save for the trip.

Money is always a sore subj in our house, we always fight about it.

Birdie said...

So you think Serge has some 'splainin' to do. And, clearly, if he just thought about it for a minute, he would see the wisdom of your words.

Forgive me for teasing, but you sound just like my husband. His stress comes from worrying about the myriad of possibilities instead of just what is. (In his case, it's one symptom of OCD; but he is extreme.) Sometimes I will take him to the Worst Case Scenario and talk about what we'd do if that happened. Now that we have a plan, he doesn't have to think about it anymore.

If, indeed, you do always get through, then admire your adaptability, flexibility and strength. You two have got that and more.

And have another Reese's egg.

Birdie

Lemuel said...

If I remember a tidbit from your past correctly, I can understand why you have obsessed over unpaid bills. I certainly share that obsession.

Patricia said...

I hear you about stressing over money issues. Chris never stresses, never worries, never plans and it makes me crazy. I'm always the hardass saying NO and I hate it.

Oh how I love sales like Zellers'!

Anonymous said...

That's funny. My wife and I are very much like the two of you when it comes to finances. I pay the bills and say we have nothing to worry about, though at the same time saying we have to cut back on spending. While my wife worries about it and feels we don't have money to buy anything.

My adventures said...

Money is the #1 cause for divorce!!
I know that first hand, I'm more like Serge!! And I strongly suggest a healthy compromise on both your parts!

Anonymous said...

Well, you know how I feel about money...you either have it or you don't and you should try to have SOME fun with it while you are here.

Of course, you also know how I feel about anxiety and if you're feeling anxious, then Serge needs to respect that.

Why can't you worry about normal things like I do? (Said with tongue firmly planted in cheek!)
-Rox

ChickenStrip said...

I have heard that you will have more money if you don't worry about having money. Who knows? With our economy, it is hard not to. And if it is inherent in someone to worry, no sense trying to change that - you're hard-wired to do so.

I worry about everything. I try hard not to worry about money, but I do. Still doesn't keep me from "consuming" - it's like a hobby. Unfortunately, the BF is kinda the same way. Good thing we don't share finances!

LOVE THE TABLE! Excellent choice!

GayProf said...

Well, you could at least try to become brown-eyed.

TED said...

Believe me, I'm all about living in the moment, but when it comes to finances, living in the moment is really not a workable plan. I mean, I'm sure it worked for the Buddha, but the Buddha didn't have to worry about property taxes and subprime mortgages and recessions. You can always think of Aesop's fable about the ant and the grasshopper as a folkloric reference to justify some amount of worrying over finances.

I have to believe that you have a budget and some long-range financial goals. It seems to me that you and Serge ought to sit down and agree on the budget and the goals. Clearly, he has legitimate needs and wants: it's not unreasonable to want a nice table or to want your bedroom not to resemble a prison cell. But if you guys can come to an agreement on what you're working towards and a monthly budget, then as long as you're flexible in developing the agreements, you're perfectly within your rights to ask, "Is that in the budget?" And then maybe you could worry less about it on a day-to-day basis.

A Lewis said...

Financial wailings are the norm, by far. Everywhere. Every househole. I've been to a Zeller's....in Richmond, near Vancouver.

Anonymous said...

Um. If you are not worrying about money then you are worrying about whether you should stay married and how the kids are going to deal. What about those people who never worry? I don't think S is that guy, BTW. But there must be someone who doesn't. Wow, what a thought.

Anonymous said...

"...I about peed my pants with excitement."

Wow.

The Torn I know would've shat himself...

Mark in DE said...

Ah, hearing about your discussions about money spending make me feel right at home. Spouse & I engage in this same 'song and dance'.

Congrats on the 3 pairs of jeans in your size!

Mark :-)

Java said...

LOL @ Dirk!
What a marvelous table! Congratulaions on the purchase of the table at such a reasonable price.

Yada yada, worry worry...
Let me tell you about the worrier vs the non-worrier. One day many years ago a towel fell off the shelf and into the toilet. I had seen how precarious the towel was perched and expected it would fall one day. (Why didn't I move it? I have no clue) So it came as no surprise when it fell. Superman, on the other hand, was upset. Very upset. EXTREMELY over-upset. Why? Because he had to worry enough for the both of us, since I obviously wasn't worrying sufficiently. We laugh about this now.

Anonymous said...

oh dear christ child, you and Serge sound EXACTLY like my hubby and I. I'm the money-worrier, he's the one who can't be bothered. I understand your frustration completely.

Thank you for your kind answer to my nagging oven question. I shall sleep soundly tonight...until I ride my bike off another bridge.

Bugsy said...

At least its good that you know yourself and your spouse! That's half the battle! Most just give up.

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the table... If I come up can we have an orgy on it?

bardelf said...

I hope Zellers throughout the Confederation is not closing; I love the Z!

I am so like you, Richard, when it comes to stressing over money and our relationship with our spouses.

Forget channeling Lucy and Desi. Ethel is where it's at! Channel Ethel, man, and life will be better!

dantallion said...

Zellers is closing?? Where the hell have I been?

The table is kinda sexy.

David said...

Okay, got to admit, when you mentioned the whole Ricky and Lucy thing, I pictured you, eyes arched, hat tilting like a windmill,yelling, and clutching this months bill and saying, "Oh, Serge, you have some splainin' to do."

Sunshine said...

Good on you! Some people are so financially illiterate that makes me cringe but as long as it's somebody else, I'm not about to judge either. But if it's my partner who is the one being financially indiscreet, it drives me up the wall.

People just need to understand that money can give you a damn good life if you can tame it but if it gets out of hand, you'd become its slave quick smart.

Cooper said...

I hope you remembered to cash in all your Zellers points before it closed!

Love the table!

S said...

Luuucy, yah gah sum 'splaining do do!