Friday, May 27, 2005

Definitions are unimportant

Did you know that there are quite a few vowelless words in the English language. This is very handy information if you're, say, playing Scrabble and the tile gods are being stingy with the vowels. I learned these words (and lots of others with only vowels) while playing Boggle on-line for several years. When you play boggle on-line, you always get to see what words were found by other players once the round is finished. So I always studied the list in order to improve my boggle score. Facts I'm not proud of include the 3500 hours I spent playing that game before my computer hiccuped and wouldn't let me play anymore (this was last year) and the 600 hours I have devoted to Scrabble just this year alone. Turns out that all that useless word knowledge made me look like a cheater on Scrabble, everyone demanding to know what the word cwm meant or insisting that I was anagramming when I played a word like naoi. When I am unable to convince them that I am on the up and up (I confess to them that I don't know what the words mean as it is irrelevant in Scrabble, and anyway I learned them playing boggle where the definitions are also unimportant) they often let out a string of epithets and quit the game. Lovely charming things like "you fucking asshole cheater, I'd slit your throat if I could dickhead". Hyperbole? No. This and many like it have been actual things said. I try to laugh, but it's a bit scary the hysteria within people (and the incorrent judgements made so unabashedly.) Did I mention that I memorized the 96 two letter words in the English language and the 873 three letter words ? Such a remarkable use of my mental talents don't you think? I have grown quite fond of the vowelless words (how could you not, they include cwm, psst, tsk, pht, brrr, hmm, shh) and everyone at least knows what they mean ( cwm means "a steep walled semicircular basin sometimes containing a lake" so now you know) and they are really helpful in Scrabble. My father writes that I must want to be a writer since I'm devoting so much time to it, when in reality, I'm just cutting down on my addiction, or as I like to think of it, hobby. I haven't played since I started this blog, and also maybe cleaning duties have suffered (remember how last Saturday vacuuming was a must? Still not done.) but it's nice to see a concrete result of my efforts. Did I mention that I am already a paid writer? Have been for two years now writing a weekly piece of bullshit, er I mean public relations for my old employer Spaghettini. Titled "Lifestyles", I get to write about the owners travels as they seek out new and exciting culinary hotspots and spas, hotels, and other vacation destinations while also plugging the restaurant (this week, I get to write about Father's Day brunch, please, won't you help restrain my excitement.) This blog thing is much better, though there is no monetary incentive.

In other news, Jack and Mark have arrived for a week of frolicking in Montreal. This couple in their 50's is from Halifax and both have wives and children and hold respected postions in the community. Their families have been close for a long time and the men have been carrying on together behind the scenes for 15 years. They manage to get away together once a year under various ruses to their families. If I don't work at the restaurant tonight (it's cold and cloudy now, so it's possible) I'll be visiting with them in the Village. They are like two little kids who have just got out of school for the summer, drinking buckets of alcohol and submerging themselves in the gay scene as fervently as possible before they go back to their double lives. I find it fascinating, repellant, and a bit pitiful and it makes me grateful for my life. It is difficult matching their enthusiasm for gay clubs (last time I went out in the Village was last summer) but it's fun to see their childlike energy. There's certain to be more on them, so I wanted to set that up now. They are in town until Tuesday.

Today's post is not so wry, nor humorous, but heh, that's where I'm at this morning.


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