Friday, March 30, 2007


* I like spruce beer. It's like drinking the smell of the forest.

* Once, at a friend's house, I was cornered in the kitchen by the friend's mother. Throughout the short conversation, farting noises seemed to be coming from the mother. When we were upstairs after, my friend apologized for her mother's colostomy bag.

* My imagination is always better (though not easier) than porn.

* Spouse sometimes remarks that I'm getting queenier. A decade ago, this would have caused me to shape up on my straight acting skills. Now I just smile and say, "oh well, guess that's the way I am." So relaxing, that.

* While discussing derivatives from the word false last week, one student questioned the word falacious. "Isn't that a sexual activity?"

* "What would he have had to have been able to do in order to escape?" I actually had to explain the grammar in that sentence this week. (I'll spare you here.)

* Did you see how Circuit City is rewarding its top sales people? By firing them. Meanwhile the CEO is pocketing nearly $4 million this year alone. It's all good though, the stock price shot up on the news. (please note bitter sarcasm in the last sentence.)

* Thanks for the well wishing yesterday. I'm not through it yet but functioning anyway. Have a swell weekend!


Anonymous said...

I saw that story where Circuit City is firing it's longest, hardest working employees. Why? because they can hire new people a lot cheaper. Wait, would I want to work for a company that rewards hard work and longevity by replacing me with an illegal alien? I don't think so.
Glad your feeling better, Torn.

CoffeeDog said...

Donne-moi cette phrase en francais! Agree that sentence even makes english speakers stumble.

bardelf said...

IBM has, for years, operated similarly to Circuit City. Shame on them both!

Sad, weird, funny about the friend's mother's colostomy bag. Very awkward for both of you.

Being a Southerner, I can sometimes scare myself with the ways in which I put words together. Lord have mercy!

Snooze said...

Add Circuit City to my boycott list now!

Doug said...

Corporate rewards are totally fucked up. The rich get richer at the expense of the poor. Home Depot fired their CEO with a $210 million dollar goodbye present.

dantallion said...

Your observation about imagination vs porn is hilarious. AND spot on.

GayProf said...

I have no knowledge of spruce beer, but it sounds intriguing.

dirk.mancuso said...

Spruce beer? Need to check that out.

Circuit City? Add that to the boycott list along with Wal*mart.

I find myself being queenier sometimes and also figure oh why try to fix what ain't broke.

Love the colostomy bag story.

dpaste said...

No clue about Spruce Beer either. Is it similar to Birch Beer? That I've heard of.

Porn is better than my imagination, sad to say.

Spouse deserves a bitch-slap for that remark, imho.

Kevin said...

hope your eyeball-hurting thing is feeling better.

Nicki said...

That sentence with needed grammar explanation took me three times to read and gave me a headache.

Jason said...

Do they still make spruce beer?

Patricia said...

never heard of spruce beer but it sounds like something martha stewart would garnish with a pine cone.