Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Poorific

This is the cover of a book that I got at christmas from Laverne. As you can imagine, some readers send me links and videos that are scat-funny and it always warms my heart, you guys really know how to get a chuckle out of me. So this book is full of pictures of creatively decorated doo-doo. Take for example the one below, there's something ultra revolting about it and I'll tell you what it is, it's the insinuation that it is to be eaten. (Divine suddenly popped into my head and I'm remembering how she/he actually ate the freshly shat steaming dog turd on camera. Was that Pink Flamingos? No cuts, no splicing.) I hope you plan on skipping breakfast.

I'd like to draw your attention to the red pen because that is what the picture is of. I accidentally had that book in the shot. I hope I'm not contravening any laws here, as that is not my intent. Isn't it a cool red pen?

Did you know that I have a fake doo-doo? Of course you did. I remember my first fake poo, I must have been 7 or 8 and ordered it using my allowance from the Johnson Smith Company. It was a dog turd and I amused myself helplessly with it. I also got the "Oops! I Missed" which you see pictured above. Sometimes when we have guests I place it there. Once, MIL came over and used the bathroom and the poo that I had placed there disappeared. She never said a word and when we asked, she said she didn't see anything like that. Hmmmm. No matter though, I had a spare. (Of course I did.)

Here's my pen again. I use it to correct student papers. Somehow, that darned book got in the shot again. And with my favorite photo too.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a great book. Rudolph never looked better. Now I want me some corn on the cob too. From the cover I was expecting doggie poo. That is a real nice red pen even though I can hardly see it. The fake poo is hilarious. Happy May Day!Ed

Snooze said...

Laverne got the perfect gift for you, but I'm amazed [and disturbed] that such a book even exists.

Doug said...

Ok, I'm not sure who's more twisted: Laverne or you.

That pen is certainly amazing. I never thought of using a pen in that manner.

Birdie said...

My students asked me to use any color BUT red when I corrected their papers. So they'd get them back covered in teal or purple or green. I wonder if it really took out the sting of corrections.

If I had my marking pen with me now, I'd put a delete symbol on each of those pictures. Ewwwwwww.

Greg said...

Heh heh...didn't Divine do that in "Lust in the Dust"...or is my one remaining braincell playing with me?

Nice pen. We've had some restaurant kitchen fun with fake poo. Those waitresses think they're so above that sort of thing...but you should hear them scream.

Hey, I just heard on CNN HN that someone paid a great sum of money for some petrified dinosaur poo yesterday. I know it's poo, but its also money...that wasn't you, was it?

(Heard anything about why Coop's Corridor is MIA?)

RJ March said...

Who screams at poo? Stoopid waitresses.

Poodolph just sounds funny-- that there exists a picture is just stunning

GayProf said...

There is a legion of junior professors who can't get a word published, but somebody created a book where they dressed up poo. Sigh.

Butch said...

That's a scream! I would love to put that sign ( the cover of the book ) on my front lawn. Our dog never goes out without his leash but we have a few neighbors who think we should all share in their dog's droppings. Ironically, those dogs never go on their own lawns.

( I hate playing games, but I make an exception and take a shovel, pick up the poo then, do a yard toss and see how far I can fling it into their yard or driveway. ) They don't seem to notice...heh heh.

Birdie said...

Those of you who want to know about Cooper's blog should read the comments to the post about gay dads on Joe.My.God.

I hope he re-emerges elsewhere. Sad day.

A Bear in the Woods said...

I am sooooo appalled.
giggling, but appalled.
I bet the MIL sat on the fake turd without looking.