After thirteen years with a person, you get pretty used to their shit. And by shit I mean, habits, likes, dislikes, moods, and behavior patterns. We've all got them and with any luck, we find partners willing to put up with them. The fastest way to the destruction of a relationship is when one of the parties thinks they can actually change the other, but then you knew that, didn't you?
I was hacked off by spouse twice yesterday and unfortunately for him, I'm going to tell you about it. The first was when I made dinner (steak, pasta and brussel sprouts) and served it. He bitched and moaned about the quantity (he always says my portions are too big, but come on, it was 3 brussel sprouts, a tiny bit of pasta because I know he gets cranky about big portions, and a nice juicy steak) and whined bitterly about how I will never learn. I thought the plates looked beautiful and delicious and was quite clipped that none of his bitching was preceded by "thank you". Sometimes I think we are more civil to complete strangers on the telephone than we are to each other.
Then when I woke up at 1:30 last night to go pee, I saw that he was at my computer using the mouse and the keyboard! He saw me and before I could say a word, he said "You had a virus. I'm fixing it!" Of course I was upset because the last time he dickered with my computer, files mysteriously disappeared (it's not his fault, he swears) and so I went to stand next to him to monitor what he was doing on my computer. Plus I was in wadded pantyland because I wanted to be back in bed. He was supremely irritated that I was treating him like a child. Sigh. When he came to bed a few minutes after, we took careful pains not to touch each other in any way, both of us petulantly holding our little grudge.
So today I have to calm myself down, take a deep breath and remember those good things. Like the fact that he sets up the coffee pot every night so that I will have hot coffee ready for me when I wake up. (I always get up first) Really, I owe him a lot of patience and tolerance just for that thing there.