Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Eating my foot

Oy, I've gotta make this quick this morning. I keep thinking I'll get used to these early mornings, but no, it's torture rising when it's still dark.

Had a student join the class yesterday after having been absent the first week. As I normally do, I try to get to know the student a bit, so I peppered her with the usual questions. "Where do you live?" " How long have you worked here?" "Do you have any kids?" etc. After revealing that she had four kids aged 8 -18, I asked about the father. She announced that he had died last month. I apologized and offered requisite condolences. Then I brought my foot up and crammed it into my mouth asking, "And who is watching the kids while you're here at work?" She immediatley burst into tears and I went into damage control mode, moving quickly onto something else.

There was so much pain there, just waiting to jump out, only I didn't see it.

God I felt like a schmuck.


dantallion said...


But there was absolutely nothing intentionally harsh about what you were asking, it was simply an honest question - and I'm sure she'll realise that if she hasn't already. Don't give yourself a hard time about it.

I guess they don't call them difficult situations for nothing.

The Wisdom of Wislon said...

Agree with Dantallion, don't beat yourself up. Knowing me i'd say the wrong thing too. Atleast you care.
Thanks for giving me and my blog a lift today. you're a goodun.

_Psycho said...

Geesh, that sure give a bad feeling. Must be so complicated. At least her kids are 8+, I wouldn't want to see it with 4 kids 1-8, at laest at 8 they in school isn't ? (God I suck not knowing that)

Unknown said...

Aww sweetie you weren't to know! That was upset just waiting to spill. And hurray, she gets to have a sensitive guy as a tutor!

r said...

ooh, I'm so sorry that happened. Ouch. It's what everyone else posted though, it wasn't your fault.

Remember that idea about our intentions? And how they are picked up by others? Your intentions were kind and good. She's just in a horrible place right now.

Hope today is better.

St. Dickeybird said...

Oh No!
Don't worry though, we all do things like that.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, plus I know that now you know where she's at you will be kind to her. that is a good thing.

Heidi said...

Hugs for you..Just care and concern..Nothing wong with that. You had no idea.

Hope you had better day today.

t said...

Same here.
I'm sure that when she thought about it she realized you definitely had good intentions.
She's probably been breaking into tears easily ever since her husband died, so don't take it personally.
What a terrible thing to happen to someone.

Joe said...

Oh geez.

I think 'T' put it best. Hope you aren't beating yourself up over your misstep.

Anonymous said...

So! who are watching the kids?
pet pirepete

Anonymous said...

If no one knows Richard makes girls cry....but he has no control onto that.
please delete my comment.
Moua Moua
pet pirepete

Anonymous said...

good to see you haven't changed THAT MUCH!